,PO/HUM\S ,NOTES ( ! ,H]MIT ,F$OR ,KUZMI* 

#aie 

,PEOPLE 3 

,AU?OR 3 ,LEO ,TOL/OY 

,TRANSLATOR 3 ,AYLM] ,MAUDE 

,TEXT 3 

7,PO/HUM\S NOTES ( ! H]MIT1 ,F$OR ,KUZMI*1 :O DI$ 9 ,SIB]IA 9 A HUT BELONG+ TO ,KHROMOV1 ! M]*ANT1 NE> ! T[N ( ,TOMSK1 ON ! #b? ,JANU>Y #a#h#f#d7 

,DUR+ ! LIFETIME ( ! H]MIT ,F$OR ,KUZMI*1 :O APPE>$ 9 ,SIB]IA 9 #ahcf & LIV$ !RE 9 DIFF]5T P>TS = TW5TY-SEV5 YE>S1 /RANGE RUMORS W]E RIFE ?AT HE - CONCEAL+ HIS REAL NAME & RANK - WAS NONE O!R ?AN ,ALEX&] ! ,FIR/4 ,AFT] HIS DEA? !SE RUMORS BECAME MORE DEF9ITE & WIDESPREAD4 ,?AT HE REALLY WAS ,ALEX&] ! ,FIR/ WAS BELIEV$ DUR+ ! REIGN ( ,ALEX&] ,I,I,I NOT ONLY BY ! COMMON PEOPLE1 BUT ALSO 9 ,C\RT CIRCLES & EV5 BY MEMB]S ( ! ,IMP]IAL FAMILY4 ,AMONG O!RS1 ! HI/ORIAN ,S*ILD]1 :O WROTE A HI/ORY ( ,ALEX&]'S REIGN1 BELIEV$ IT4 

,!SE RUMORS W]E OCCASION$ BY ! FOLL[+ FACTS3 FIR/1 ,ALEX&] DI$ QUITE UNEXPECT$LY )\T ANY PREVI\S S]I\S ILLNESS2 SECONDLY1 HE DI$ F> FROM HIS FAMILY 9 ! \T-(-!-WAY T[N ( ,TAGANROG4.<#a.>  ,?IRDLY1 ?OSE :O SAW HIM PLAC$ 9 HIS C(F9 SAID HE HAD SO *ANG$ AS TO BE UNRECOGNIZABLE1 & HE WAS !RE=E COV]$ UP & NOT %[N TO ANYONE4 ,F\R?LY1 ,ALEX&] HAD REPEAT$LY SAID & WRITT5 - ESPECIALLY ( LATE YE>S - ?AT HE ONLY DESIR$ TO BE FREE FROM HIS POSITION & RETIRE FROM ! WORLD4 ,FIF?LY - A LITTLE-KN[N FACT - 9 ! (FICIAL REPORT DESCRIB+ HIS BODY IT IS M5TION$ ?AT HIS BACK & LO9S W]E PURPLE-BR[N & R$1 :I* ! ,EMP]OR'S PAMP]$ BODY W\LD C]TA9LY NOT HAVE BE54 

,! REASONS :Y ,KUZMI* WAS SUSPECT$ ( BE+ ,ALEX&] ,I 9 HID+ W]E1 9 ! FIR/ PLACE1 ?AT ! H]MIT RESEMBL$ ! ,EMP]OR 9 HEI<T1 FIGURE1 & C\NT5ANCE SO MU* ?AT ?OSE :O HAD SE5 ,ALEX&] & HIS PORTRAITS 7A PALACE FOOTMAN1 = 9/ANCE1 :O RECOGNIZ$ ,KUZMI* AS ,ALEX&]7 NOTIC$ A /RIK+ RESEMBLANCE BETWE5 ! TWO4 ,!Y W]E ( ! SAME AGE & HAD ! SAME *>ACT]I/IC /OOP4 ,SECONDLY1 ,KUZMI*1 :O GAVE HIMSELF \T AS A TRAMP :O HAD =GOTT5 HIS P>5TAGE1 KNEW =EIGN LANGUAGES & BY HIS DIGNIFI$ AFFABILITY %[$ HIMSELF TO BE A MAN ACCU/OM$ TO ! HI<E/ POSITION4 ,?IRDLY1 ! H]MIT NEV] DISCLOS$ HIS NAME OR CALL+ TO ANYONE1 YET BY EXPRESSIONS ?AT ESCAP$ HIM 9VOLUNT>ILY1 BETRAY$ HIMSELF AS ONE :O HAD ONCE RANK$ ABOVE EV]YBODY ELSE4 ,F\R?LY1 %ORTLY BE=E HIS DEA? HE DE/ROY$ SOME PAP]S ( :I* A S+LE %EET REMA9$ ) /RANGE CIPH]S & ! 9ITIALS ,A4 ,P4 .<#b.> ,FIF?LY1 NOT)/&+ HIS GREAT PIETY ! H]MIT NEV] W5T TO CONFESSION1 & :5 A BI%OP :O VISIT$ HIM TRI$ TO P]SUADE HIM TO FULFILL ?AT ,*RI/IAN DUTY1 HE REPLI$1 ',IF ,I DID NOT TELL ! TRU? AB\T MYSELF AT CONFESSION ! HEAV5S W\LD BE AMAZ$1 BUT IF ,I TOLD :O ,I AM ! E>? W\LD BE AMAZ$4' 

,ALL !SE GUESSES & D\BTS CEAS$ TO BE D\BTS & BECAME C]TA9TIES AS A RESULT ( ! F9D+ ( ,KUZMI*'S DI>Y4 ,?IS DI>Y IS H]E GIV54 ,IT BEG9S AS FOLL[S3 

,GOD BLESS MY 9VALUABLE FRI5D ,IVAN ,GRIGOREVI*.<#c.> = ?IS DELI<TFUL RETREAT4 ,I DO NOT DES]VE HIS K9DNESS & ,GOD'S M]CY4 ,H]E ,I AM AT PEACE4 ,FEW] PEOPLE COME & ,I AM ALONE ) MY GUILTY MEMORIES & ) ,GOD4 ,I WILL TRY TO AVAIL MYSELF ( ! SOLITUDE TO GIVE A CLOSE DESCRIPTION ( MY LIFE4 ,IT MAY BE ( USE TO O!RS4 

,I WAS BORN & SP5T =TY-SEV5 YE>S ( MY LIFE AMID MO/ T]RIBLE TEMPTATIONS4 ,I NOT ONLY DID NOT RESI/ !M BUT REVEL$ 9 !M1 WAS TEMPT$ & TEMPT$ O!RS1 S9N$ & CAUS$ O!RS TO S94 ,BUT ,GOD TURN$ HIS EYES ON ME1 & ! :OLE VIL5ESS ( MY LIFE1 :I* ,I HAD TRI$ TO JU/IFY TO MYSELF BY LAY+ ! BLAME ON O!RS1 REVEAL$ ITSELF TO ME AT LA/ 9 ITS FULL HORROR4 ,& ,GOD HELP$ ME TO LIB]ATE MYSELF1 NOT FROM EVIL - ,I AM /ILL FULL ( IT ?\< ,I /RUGGLE AGA9/ IT - BUT FROM P>TICIPATION 9 IT4 ,:AT M5TAL SUFF]+S ,I 5DUR$ & :AT W5T ON 9 MY S\L :5 ,I UND]/OOD MY :OLE S9FULNESS & ! NECESSITY ( ATONEM5T - NOT A BELIEF 9 ATONEM5T1 BUT REAL ATONEM5T = S9S BY MY [N SUFF]+ - ,I WILL DESCRIBE 9 DUE C\RSE4 ,AT PRES5T ,I WILL ONLY DESCRIBE MY ACTIONS3 H[ ,I MANAG$ TO ESCAPE FROM MY POSITION1 LEAV+ 9 PLACE ( MY BODY ! CORPSE ( A SOLDI] ,I HAD TORM5T$ TO DEA?2 & ,I WILL BEG9 ! DESCRIPTION ( MY LIFE FROM ITS V]Y COMM5CEM5T4 

,MY FLI<T OCCURR$ 9 ?IS WAY3 

,9 ,TAGANROG ,I LIV$ 9 ! SAME MAD WAY 9 :I* ,I HAD BE5 LIV+ = ! LA/ TW5TY-F\R YE>S4 ,I - ! GREATE/ ( CRIM9ALS1 ! MURD]] ( MY FA!R1 ! MURD]] ( HUNDR$S ( ?\S&S ( M5 9 W>S ,I HAD OCCASION$1 AN ABOM9ABLE DEBAU*EE & A MISCREANT - BELIEV$ :AT PEOPLE TOLD ME AB\T MYSELF & CONSID]$ MYSELF ! SAVIOR ( ,EUROPE1 A B5EFACTOR ( MANK9D1 AN EXCEPTIONALLY P]FECT MAN1 UN HEUREUX HAS>D1.<#d.> AS ,I ONCE EXPRESS$ IT TO ,MADAME DE ,/AEL4 ,I CONSID]$ MYSELF SU*1 BUT ,GOD HAD NOT QUITE =SAK5 ME & ! NEV]-SLEEP+ VOICE ( CONSCI5CE TR\BL$ ME UNCEAS+LY4 ,NO?+ PLEAS$ ME1 EV]YONE WAS TO BLAME4 ,I ALONE WAS GOOD & NO ONE UND]/OOD IT4 ,I TURN$ TO ,GOD1 PRAY$ TO ! ,OR?ODOX ,GOD ) ,FOTI1.<#e.> !N TO ! ,ROMAN ,CA?OLIC ,GOD1 !N TO ! ,PROTE/ANT ,GOD ) ,P>ROT1.<#f.> !N TO ! ,GOD ( ! ,ILLUM9ATI ) ,KRUD5]2.<#g.> BUT EV5 TO ,GOD ,I ONLY TURN$ 9 ! SI<T ( M51 ?AT !Y MI<T ADMIRE ME4 ,I DESPIS$ EV]YBODY1 & YET ! OP9ION ( ! PEOPLES DESPIS$ WAS ! ONLY ?+ IMPORTANT TO ME2 ,I LIV$ & ACT$ = ITS SAKE ALONE4 ,IT WAS T]RIBLE = ME TO BE ALONE4 ,/ILL MORE T]RIBLE WAS IT TO BE ) H] - MY WIFE1 N>R[-M9D$1 DECEITFUL1 CAPRICI\S1 MALICI\S1 CONSUMPTIVE1 & FULL ( PRET5SE4 ,%E POISON$ MY LIFE MORE ?AN ANY?+ ELSE4 ,WE W]E SUPPOS$ TO BE SP5D+ A SECOND HONEYMOON1 BUT IT WAS A HELL 9 =MS ( RESPECTABILITY - FALSE & T]RIBLE4 

,ONCE ,I FELT P>TICUL>LY WRET*$4 ,I HAD RECEIV$ A LETT] FROM ,>AK*EEV.<#h.> ! EV5+ BE=E AB\T ! ASSASS9ATION ( HIS MI/RESS4 ,HE DESCRIB$ TO ME HIS DESP]ATE GRIEF4 ,/RANGE TO SAY1 HIS CONT9UAL SUBTLE FLATT]Y1 & NOT ONLY FLATT]Y BUT REAL DOG-LIKE DEVOTION - :I* HAD BEGUN :ILE MY FA!R WAS ALIVE & :5 WE BO? SWORE ALLEGIANCE TO HIM 9 SECRET FROM MY GR&MO!R.<#i.> - ?AT DOG-LIKE DEVOTION ( HIS MADE ME LOVE HIM1 IF 9DE$ LATT]LY ,I LOV$ ANY MAN - & ?\< TO USE ! WORD LOVE ( SU* A MON/] IS WRONG4 ,ANO!R ?+ ?AT B\ND ME TO HIM WAS HIS NOT HAV+ TAK5 P>T 9 ! MURD] ( MY FA!R1 AS MANY O!RS DID :O BECAME HATEFUL TO ME JU/ BECAUSE !Y W]E MY ACCOMPLICES 9 ?AT CRIME1 BUT HE NOT ONLY TOOK NO P>T 9 IT BUT WAS DEVOT$ BO? TO MY FA!R & TO ME2 ( ?AT LAT]1 H[EV]4 

,I SLEPT BADLY4 ,/RANGE TO SAY1 ! MURD] ( ?AT BEAUTY - ! SPITEFUL ,NA/ASYA 7%E WAS EXTRAORD9>ILY VOLUPTU\SLY BEAUTIFUL7 - >\S$ DESIRE 9 ME1 & ,I C\LD NOT SLEEP ALL NI<T4 ,! FACT ?AT MY CONSUMPTIVE1 ABHORR5T1 & UNDESIR$ WIFE LAY 9 ! NEXT ROOM BUT ONE VEX$ & TORM5T$ ME /ILL MORE4 ,! MEMORY ( ,M>YA1.<#a.> :O DES]T$ ME = AN 9SIGNIFICANT DIPLOMAT1 ALSO TORM5T$ ME4 ,IT SEEM$ ?AT BO? MY FA!R & ,I W]E FAT$ TO BE JEAL\S ( A ,GAG>94.<#a#a.> ,BUT ,I AM AGA9 LETT+ MYSELF BE C>RI$ AWAY BY REM9ISC5CES4 ,I DID NOT SLEEP ALL NI<T4 ,DAWN BEGAN TO BREAK4 ,I DREW ! CURTA91 PUT ON MY :ITE DRESS+-G[N1 & CALL$ MY VALET4 ,ALL W]E /ILL ASLEEP4 ,I DONN$ A FROCK-COAT1 A CIVILIAN OV]COAT & CAP1 & W5T \T PA/ ! S5T9ELS & 9TO ! /REET4 

,! SUN WAS JU/ RIS+ OV] ! SEA4 ,IT WAS A COOL AUTUMN MORN+1 & 9 ! FRE% AIR ,I IMM$IATELY FELT BETT] & MY D>K ?\<TS VANI%$4 ,I WALK$ T[>DS ! SUN-FLECK$ SEA4 ,BE=E REA*+ ! GRE5-COLOR$ H\SE AT ! CORN] ,I HE>D ! S\NDS ( DRUMS & FLUTES FROM ! SQU>E4 ,I LI/5$1 & REALIZ$ ?AT SOMEONE WAS BE+ MADE TO RUN ! GANTLET4 ,I1 :O HAD SO (T5 SANCTION$ ?AT =M ( PUNI%M5T1 HAD NEV] SE5 IT EXECUT$4 ,& /RANGE TO SAY - EVID5TLY AT ! DEVIL'S 9/IGATION - ! ?\<T ( ! MURD]$1 VOLUPTU\SLY BEAUTIFUL ,NA/ASYA & ( ! SOLDI]'S BODY BE+ LA%$ BY RODS1 M]G$ 9TO ONE /IMULAT+ S5SATION4 ,I REMEMB]$ ! M5 ( ! ,SEM5OV ,REGIM5T & ! MILIT>Y EXILES1 HUNDR$S ( :OM W]E FLOGG$ TO DEA? 9 ?IS WAY1 & ! /RANGE IDEA ( WITNESS+ ?AT SPECTACLE SUDD5LY OCCURR$ TO ME4 ,AS ,I WAS 9 CIVILIAN CLO!S ?IS WAS POSSIBLE4 

,! NE>] ,I DREW ! CLE>] CAME ! RATTL+ ( ! DRUMS & ! S\ND ( ! FLUTES4 ,BE+ %ORT-SI<T$ ,I C\LD NOT SEE CLE>LY )\T MY LORGNETTE1 BUT C\LD ALREADY MAKE \T ! R[S ( SOLDI]S & A TALL1 :ITE-BACK$ FIGURE MOV+ BETWE5 !M4 ,:5 ,I GOT AMONG ! CR[D ?AT /OOD BEH9D ! R[S WAT*+ ! SPECTACLE1 ,I DREW \T MY LORGNETTE & WAS ABLE TO SEE ALL ?AT WAS BE+ DONE4 ,A TALL1 R\ND-%\LD]$ MAN1 HIS B>E >MS TI$ TO A BAYONET1 & HIS B>E BACK H]E & !RE ALREADY GR[+ R$ ) BLOOD1 WAS ADVANC+ BETWE5 R[S ( SOLDI]S :O HELD RODS4 ,?AT MAN WAS ,I3 HE WAS MY D\BLE4 ,! SAME HEI<T1 ! SAME R\ND %\LD]S1 ! SAME BALD HEAD1 ! SAME :ISK]S )\T A MU/A*E1 ! SAME *EEK-BONES1 ! SAME M\? & BLUE EYES2 BUT HIS M\? DID NOT SMILE2 IT KEPT OP5+ & TWI/+ AS HE SCREAM$ AT ! BL[S1 & HIS EYES1 N[ CLOS+ & N[ OP5+1 W]E NOT T5D] & C>ESS+ BUT />T$ T]RIBLY FROM HIS HEAD4 

,:5 ,I HAD LOOK$ WELL AT ?IS MAN ,I RECOGNIZ$ HIM4 ,IT WAS ,/RUM5SKI1 A LEFT-FLANK NONCOMMISSION$ (FIC] ( ! #cRD ,COMPANY ( ! ,SEM5OV ,REGIM5T1 AT ONE TIME WELL KN[N TO ALL ! ,GU>DS ON ACC\NT ( HIS LIK5ESS TO ME4 ,!Y US$ JOK+LY TO CALL HIM ,ALEX&] ,I,I4 

,I KNEW ?AT HE HAD BE5 TRANSF]R$ TO G>RISON-DUTY ) O!R RIOT]S ( ! ,SEM5OV ,REGIM5T1 & ,I GUESS$ ?AT H]E1 9 G>RISON1 HE HAD DONE SOME?+ - PROBABLY DES]T$ - HAD BE5 RECAPTUR$1 & WAS N[ BE+ PUNI%$4 ,I LE>N$ LAT] ?AT ?IS WAS SO4 

,I /OOD AS ONE SPELLB\ND1 WAT*+ H[ ! UN=TUNATE MAN MOV$ & H[ !Y FLOGG$ HIM1 & ,I FELT ?AT SOME?+ WAS GO+ ON )9 ME4 ,BUT ,I SUDD5LY NOTIC$ ?AT ! PEOPLE /&+ BESIDE ME1 ! SPECTATORS1 W]E LOOK+ AT ME1 & ?AT SOME DREW BACK FROM ME :ILE O!RS APPROA*$4 ,I HAD EVID5TLY BE5 RECOGNIZ$4 ,HAV+ REALIZ$ ?IS ,I TURN$ TO HURRY HOME4 ,! DRUMS /ILL BEAT & ! FLUTES PLAY$ - SO ! TORTURES W]E /ILL GO+ ON4 ,MY *IEF FEEL+ WAS ?AT ,I \<T TO APPROVE ( :AT WAS BE+ DONE TO ?IS D\BLE ( M9E2 OR IF NOT APPROVE AT LEA/ ACKN[L$GE ?AT IT WAS ! PROP] ?+ TO DO1 BUT ,I C\LD NOT4 ,YET ,I FELT ?AT IF ,I DID NOT ADMIT IT TO BE NECESS>Y & RI<T1 ,I %\LD HAVE TO ADMIT ?AT MY :OLE LIFE & ALL MY ACTIONS W]E BAD1 & %\LD HAVE TO DO :AT ,I HAD LONG WI%$ TO3 AB&ON EV]Y?+1 GO AWAY1 & DISAPPE>4 

,I /RUGGL$ AGA9/ ?IS FEEL+ ?AT SEIZ$ ME3 N[ ADMITT+ ?AT ! ?+ WAS RI<T - A MELAN*OLY NECESSITY - & N[ ADMITT+ ?AT ,I \<T MYSELF TO HAVE BE5 9 ! PLACE ( ?AT WRET*$ MAN4 ,BUT /RANGELY 5\< ,I FELT NO PITY = HIM1 & 9/EAD ( /OPP+ ! TORTURE ,I W5T HOME1 FE>+ ONLY LE/ ,I %\LD BE RECOGNIZ$4 

,SOON ! S\NDS ( ! DRUMS CEAS$1 & ON REA*+ HOME ,I SEEM$ TO HAVE %AK5 (F ! FEEL+ ?AT HAD COME OV] ME4 ,!RE ,I DRANK TEA & RECEIV$ A REPORT FROM ,VOLKONSKI4.<#a#b.> ,!N CAME ! USUAL LUN*1 ! USUAL BURD5SOME & 9S9C]E RELATIONS ) MY WIFE2 !N ,DIEBITS*.<#a#c.> ) A REPORT CONFIRM+ 9=MATION WE HAD HAD ( A SECRET SOCIETY4 ,9 DUE TIME1 :5 ,I WRITE ! :OLE /ORY ( MY LIFE1 ,I WILL1 ,GOD WILL+1 REC\NT IT ALL 9 DETAIL2 BUT N[ ,I WILL ONLY SAY ?AT ,I RECEIV$ ?AT REPORT TOO ) \TW>D COMPOSURE4 ,BUT ?IS LA/$ ONLY TILL AFT] D9N]1 :5 ,I W5T TO MY /UDY1 LAY D[N ON ! C\*1 & IMM$IATELY FELL ASLEEP4 

,I HAD H>DLY BE5 ASLEEP FIVE M9UTES :5 A %OCK PASS+ ?R\< MY :OLE BODY SEEM$ TO AWAKE ME1 & ,I HE>D ! RATTL+ ( ! DRUMS1 ! FLUTES1 ! S\ND ( ! BL[S1 ! SCREAMS ( ,/RUM5SKI1 & SAW HIM OR MYSELF - ,I C\LD NOT TELL :I* ( US WAS ,I2 ,I SAW HIS LOOK ( SUFF]+ & ! GLOOMY FACES ( ! SOLDI]S & (FIC]S4 ,?IS DELUSION DID NOT LA/ LONG4 ,I JUMP$ UP1 BUTTON$ MY COAT1 PUT ON MY HAT & SWORD1 & W5T \T1 SAY+ ,I WAS GO+ = A WALK4 

,I KNEW :]E ! MILIT>Y HOSPITAL WAS & W5T /RAI<T TO IT4 ,MY APPE>ANCE AS USUAL CAUS$ A COMMOTION4 ,! HEAD DOCTOR & ! HEAD ( ! /AFF CAME RUNN+ UP BREA?LESS4 ,I SAID ,I WI%$ TO GO ?R\< ! W>DS4 ,9 ! SECOND W>D ,I SAW ,/RUM5SKI'S BALD HEAD4 ,HE WAS LY+ PRONE ) HIS HEAD ON HIS >MS1 MOAN+ PITIFULLY4 ',HE HAS BE5 PUNI%$ = TRY+ TO DES]T1' ,I WAS TOLD4 

,I SAID ',AH6' & MADE MY USUAL GE/URE ( APPROVAL AT :AT ,I HE>D1 & ,I WALK$ ON4 

,NEXT DAY ,I S5T TO 9QUIRE H[ ,/RUM5SKI WAS1 & WAS TOLD ?AT HE HAD RECEIV$ ! SACRAM5T & WAS DY+4 

,IT WAS BRO!R ,MI*AEL'S NAME-DAY1.<#a#d.> & !RE WAS TO BE A P>ADE & A SPECIAL S]VICE4 ,I SAID ,I WAS UNWELL AFT] MY J\RNEY ?R\< ! ,CRIMEA1 & ,I DID NOT ATT5D ! ,MASS4 ,DIEBITS* RETURN$1 & AGA9 REPORT$ AB\T ! PLOT 9 ! ,SECOND ,>MY1 REM9D+ ME ( :AT ,C\NT ,WITTE HAD TOLD ME BE=E MY VISIT TO ! ,CRIMEA1 & ( ! REPORT ( ! NONCOMMISSION$ (FIC] ,%]WOOD4 

,ONLY :ILE LI/5+ TO ! REPORT ( ,DIEBITS*1 :O ATTA*$ SU* IMM5SE IMPORTANCE TO ALL !SE ATTEMPT$ CONSPIRACIES1 DID ,I SUDD5LY FEEL ! FULL SIGNIFICANCE & /R5G? ( ! *ANGE ?AT HAD TAK5 PLACE )9 ME4 ,!Y W]E CONSPIR+ 9 ORD] TO ALT] \R SY/EM ( GOV]NM5T & 9TRODUCE A ,CON/ITUTION - ! V]Y ?+ ?AT ,I HAD WANT$ TO DO TW5TY YE>S BACK4 ,I HAD MADE & UNMADE ,CON/ITUTIONS 9 ,EUROPE1 & :AT & :O IS ANY ! BETT] = IT8 ,& ABOVE ALL :O WAS ,I ?AT ,I %\LD DO IT8 ,ALL EXT]NAL LIFE1 ALL >RANGEM5TS ( EXT]NAL AFFAIRS & ALL P>TICIPATION 9 !M - HAD ,I NOT P>TICIPAT$ 9 !M & RE>RANG$ ! LIFE ( ! PEOPLES ( ,EUROPE8 - SEEM$ UNIMPORTANT1 UNNECESS>Y1 & DID NOT T\* ME4 ,I SUDD5LY REALIZ$ ?AT NONE ( IT WAS M9E2 ?AT MY BUS9ESS WAS ) MYSELF - MY S\L4 ,ALL MY OLD DESIRES TO ABDICATE - =M]LY O/5TATI\S1 ) A WI% TO DEMON/RATE !M ! GR&EUR ( MY S\L & TO A/ONI% PEOPLE & MAKE !M REGRET ME - N[ RETURN$ ) FRE% =CE & COMPLETE S9C]ITY1 EXCEPT NO LONG] = ! %[ BUT ONLY = MYSELF1 = MY S\L4 ,IT WAS AS IF MY :OLE LIFE1 A BRILLIANT ONE 9 ! WORLDLY S5SE1 HAD BE5 LIV$ ONLY ?AT ,I MI<T RETURN TO ?AT Y\?FUL DESIRE - EVOK$ BY REP5TANCE - TO AB&ON EV]Y?+2 BUT TO AB&ON IT )\T VANITY1 )\T ?\<T ( HUMAN FAME1 BUT ONLY = MY [N S\L'S SAKE1 I4E4 = ,GOD4 ,!N IT HAD BE5 A VAGUE DESIRE1 N[ IT WAS ! IMPOSSIBILITY ( CONT9U+ TO LIVE AS ,I HAD DONE4 

,BUT H[8 ,NOT SO AS TO A/ONI% PEOPLE & TO BE PRAIS$1 BUT ON ! CONTR>Y1 TO GO AWAY TO SUFF] & SO ?AT NO ONE KN[S4 ,& ?IS ?\<T SO PLEAS$ & DELI<T$ ME ?AT ,I BEGAN TO ?9K ( H[ TO ACCOMPLI% IT4 ,I EMPLOY$ ALL ! P[]S ( MY M9D & ALL MY *>ACT]I/IC CUNN+ TO EFFECT IT4  

,SURPRIS+LY1 ! EXECUTION ( MY 9T5TION WAS EASI] ?AN ,I HAD EXPECT$4 ,MY PLAN WAS TO PRET5D TO BE ILL & DY+1 & HAV+ P]SUAD$ & BRIB$ A DOCTOR TO HAVE ! DY+ ,/RUM5SKI PUT 9 MY PLACE1 TO GO AWAY1 TO FLY - CONCEAL+ MY ID5TITY FROM EV]YONE4 

,IT WAS AS IF EV]Y?+ HAPP5$ EXPRESSLY = ! SUCCESS ( MY PROJECT4 ,ON ! #i?1.<#a#e.> AS IF ON PURPOSE1 ,I FELL ILL ) 9T]MITT5T FEV]4 ,I WAS ILL = AB\T A WEEK1 DUR+ :I* MY 9T5TION GREW /RONG] & /RONG] & ,I CONSID]$ MY PLAN ?OR\<LY4 ,ON ! #a#f? ,I GOT UP FEEL+ WELL4 

,?AT DAY ,I %AV$ AS USUAL1 & BE+ DEEP 9 ?\<T1 CUT MYSELF BADLY NE> ! *94 ,I LO/ MU* BLOOD &1 FEEL+ FA9T1 FELL D[N4 ,PEOPLE CAME RUNN+ & LIFT$ ME4 ,I SAW AT ONCE ?AT ?IS W\LD HELP ! EXECUTION ( MY PLAN1 & ?\< ,I FELT QUITE WELL ,I PRET5D$ TO BE V]Y WEAK1 W5T TO B$1 & HAD ,DR4 ,VIMI]'S ASSI/ANT CALL$4 ,VIMI] W\LD NOT HAVE AGRE$ TO ANY DECEPTION1 BUT ,I HOP$ TO BE ABLE TO BRIBE ?IS Y\NG MAN4 ,I DISCLOS$ MY 9T5TION & PLAN TO HIM1 & (F]$ HIM EI<TY ?\S& RUBLES IF HE W\LD DO :AT ,I DEM&$4 ,MY PLAN WAS ?IS3 ,/RUM5SKI1 AS ,I HAD LE>N$ ?AT MORN+1 WAS NE> DEA? & NOT EXPECT$ TO LIVE BEYOND ! EV5+4 ,I W5T TO B$ &1 PRET5D+ TO BE VEX$ ) EV]YBODY1 W\LD NOT LET ANYONE 9 EXCEPT ! PHYSICIAN ,I HAD BRIB$4 ,?AT NI<T HE WAS TO BR+ ,/RUM5SKI'S BODY 9 A BA?1 PUT IT 9 MY PLACE1 & ANN\NCE MY SUDD5 DEA?4 ,/RANGE TO SAY1 EV]Y?+ HAPP5$ AS WE HAD PLANN$1 & ON ! #a#g? ( ,NOVEMB] ,I WAS A FREE MAN4  

,/RUM5SKI'S BODY1 9 ITS CLOS$ C(F91 WAS BURI$ ) ! GREATE/ POMP1 & MY BRO!R ,NI*OLAS ASC5D$ ! ?RONE1 HAV+ BANI%$ ! CONSPIRATORS TO =C$ LABOR 9 ,SIB]IA4 ,I AFT]W>DS MET SOME ( !M !RE4 ,I EXP]I5C$ SUFF]+S TRIFL+ 9 COMP>ISON ) MY CRIMES1 & ! GREATE/ & QUITE UNDES]V$ HAPP9ESS ( :I* ,I WILL SPEAK 9 DUE C\RSE4 

,N[1 ON ! BR9K ( ! GRAVE1 AT ! AGE ( SEV5TY-TWO1 HAV+ UND]/OOD ! VANITY ( MY =M] LIFE & ! SIGNIFICANCE ( ! LIFE ,I HAVE LIV$ & AM LIV+ AS A W&]]1 ,I WILL TRY TO TELL ! /ORY ( MY =M] LIFE4 

,M,Y ,L,I,F,E 

#a#b? ,DECEMB]1 #a#h#d#i4 ,SIB]IAN ,=E/-SWAMP NE> ,KRASNORE*9SK 

,TODAY IS MY BIR?DAY1 ,I AM SEV5TY-TWO4 ,SEV5TY-TWO YE>S AGO ,I WAS BORN 9 ,PET]SBURG 9 ! ,W9T] ,PALACE1 9 ! AP>TM5TS ( MY MO!R ! ,EMPRESS1 !N ! ,GR& ,DU*ESS ,M>IA ,F$OROVNA4 

,I SLEPT PRETTY WELL LA/ NI<T4 ,AFT] YE/]DAY'S 9DISPOSITION ,I FEEL RA!R BETT] AGA94 ,! *IEF ?+ IS ?AT ! SPIRITUAL TORPOR ,I WAS 9 HAS PASS$1 & ,I CAN AGA9 COMMUNICATE ) ,GOD ) MY :OLE S\L4 ,LA/ NI<T ,I PRAY$ 9 ! D>K4 ,I WAS CLE>LY CONSCI\S ( MY POSITION 9 ! WORLD4 ,MY :OLE LIFE IS SOME?+ REQUIR$ BY ,HIM :O S5T ME H]E1 & ,I CAN DO :AT ,HE REQUIRES OR NOT JU/ AS ,I PLEASE4 ,BY DO+ :AT ,HE REQUIRES ,I CONDUCE T[>DS ! WELF>E ( ! :OLE WORLD4 ,BY NOT DO+ IT ,I DEPRIVE MYSELF ( WELF>E - NOT ( ALL WELF>E1 BUT ( ! WELF>E ?AT MI<T BE M9E2 BUT ,I DO NOT DEPRIVE ! WORLD ( ! WELF>E DE/9$ = IT4 ,:AT ,I \<T TO HAVE DONE WILL BE DONE BY O!RS1 SO ?AT ,HIS WILL MAY BE ACCOMPLI%$4 ,?AT IS :AT MY FREE WILL CONSI/S 94 ,BUT IF ,HE KN[S :AT WILL BE1 IF EV]Y?+ IS ORDA9$ BY ,HIM1 IS !RE ANY FRE$OM8 ,I DON'T KN[4 ,H]E ?\<T REA*ES ITS LIMITS & PRAY] BEG9S1 ! SIMPLE PRAY] ( *ILDHOOD & OLD AGE4 ',FA!R1 NOT MY WILL BUT ,Y\RS BE DONE4' ,SIMPLY3 ',LORD =GIVE & HAVE M]CY4 ,YES1 ,LORD =GIVE & HAVE M]CY1 & =GIVE & HAVE M]CY4 ,I CANNOT EXPRESS IT 9 WORDS BUT ,Y\ KN[ ! HE>T4 ,Y\ ,Y\RSELF DWELL !RE94' 

,I FELL S\NDLY ASLEEP4 ,AS USUAL1 FROM ! WEAKNESS ( OLD AGE1 ,I WOKE FIVE OR SIX TIMES & DREAM$ ,I WAS BA?+ 9 ! SEA & SWIMM+4 ,! WAT] WAS GRE5I% & BEAUTIFUL1 & ,I WAS SURPRIS$ ?AT IT HELD ME UP SO HI< ?AT ,I DID NOT S9K AT ALL4 ,SOME M5 & WOM5 W]E ON ! %ORE H9D]+ ME FROM GETT+ \T1 = ,I WAS NAK$4 ,! MEAN+ ( ?IS DREAM IS ?AT ! VIGOR ( MY BODY /ILL H9D]S ME1 BUT ?AT ! EXIT IS NE> AT H&4 

,I ROSE BE=E DAYBREAK & /RUCK A FL9T1 BUT = A LONG TIME C\LD NOT LI<T ! T9D]4 ,I PUT ON MY ELK-SK9 DRESS+-G[N & W5T \T4 ,BEH9D ! SN[-CLAD L>*ES & P9ES GL[$ A ROSY-ORANGE SKY4 ,I BR\<T 9 ! FIREWOOD ,I *OPP$ YE/]DAY1 LIT ! /OVE1 & *OPP$ SOME MORE WOOD4 ,IT GREW LI<T]4 ,I ATE SOME MOI/5$ RUSKS4 ,! /OVE HAD GR[N HOT & ,I CLOS$ ! DAMP] & SAT D[N TO WRITE4 

,I WAS BORN JU/ SEV5TY-TWO YE>S AGO1 ON ! #a#b? ( ,DECEMB]1 #a#g#g#g1 9 ,PET]SBURG1 9 ! ,W9T] ,PALACE4 ,BY MY GR&MO!R'S WI% ,I WAS NAM$ ,ALEX&]1 TO BETOK51 AS %E TOLD ME H]SELF1 MY BECOM+ AS GREAT A MAN AS ,ALEX&] ! ,GREAT & AS HOLY AS ,ALEX&] ,NEVSKI4 ,I WAS *RI/5$ A WEEK LAT] 9 ! L>GE ,PALACE ,*UR*4 ,I WAS C>RI$ ON A BROCADE PILL[ BY ! ,DU*ESS ( ,C\RL&4 ,MY COV]LET WAS HELD UP BY (FICIALS ( ! HI<E/ RANK4 ,! ,EMPRESS WAS MY GODMO!R1 & ! ,EMP]OR ( ,AU/RIA & ! ,K+ ( ,PRUSSIA W]E MY GODFA!RS4 ,! ROOM ALLOTT$ TO ME HAD BE5 >RANG$ TO MY GR&MO!R'S PLAN4 7,I DON'T REMEMB] IT AT ALL1 BUT KN[ ( IT FROM HE>SAY47 ,9 ! MIDDLE ( ?AT SPACI\S ROOM ) ITS ?REE L>GE W9D[S BETWE5 F\R PILL>S1 A VELVET CANOPY WAS FA/5$ TO ! CEIL+ ) SILK HANG+S DESC5D+ TO ! GR\ND4 ,UND] ! CANOPY WAS PLAC$ AN IRON COT ) A LEA!R MATTRESS1 A SMALL PILL[1 & A LI<T ,5GLI% BLANKET4 ,BEYOND ! HANG+S WAS A RAIL+ NE>LY FIVE FEET HI<1 TO PREV5T VISITORS FROM APPROA*+ TOO NE>4 ,!RE WAS NO O!R FURNITURE 9 ! ROOM1 EXCEPT A B$ BEH9D ! CANOPY = MY WET-NURSE4 ,EV]Y DETAIL ( MY PHYSICAL NURTURE WAS ?\<T \T BY MY GR&MO!R4 ,ROCK+ ME TO SLEEP WAS =BIDD52 ,I WAS SWADDL$ 9 A SPECIAL WAY2 ,I WORE NO SOCKS2 WAS BA!D FIR/ 9 W>M & !N 9 COLD WAT]1 & HAD SPECIAL CLO?+ )\T SEAMS OR RIBBONS1 BUT :I* C\LD ALL BE PUT ON AT ONCE4 ,AS SOON AS ,I C\LD CRAWL ,I WAS PLAC$ ON ! C>PET & LEFT TO MY [N DEVICES4 ,I HAVE BE5 TOLD ?AT AT FIR/ MY GR&MO!R H]SELF US$ (T5 TO COME & SIT ON ! C>PET TO PLAY ) ME4 ,I DON'T REMEMB] ANY?+ ( ?IS1 NOR DO ,I REMEMB] MY WET-NURSE AT ?AT TIME4 

,%E WAS ,AVDOTYA ,PETROVNA1 ! WIFE ( AN ASSI/ANT G>D5] FROM ,TS>SKOE ,SELO4 ,I DID NOT REMEMB] H] !N4 ,BUT ,I MET H] ONCE :5 ,I WAS EI<TE5 & %E CAME UP TO ME 9 ! G>D5 AT ,TS>SKOE ,SELO4 ,?AT WAS ! GOOD P]IOD ( MY LIFE1 ! E>LY DAYS ( MY FRI5D%IP ) ,ADAM ,CZ>TORYSKI1 :5 ,I WAS S9C]ELY DISGU/$ AT :AT WAS GO+ ON AT BO? ! C\RTS - ?AT ( MY UN=TUNATE FA!R & ( MY GR&MO!R1 :O HAD !N BECOME HATEFUL TO ME4 ,I WAS /ILL A HUMAN BE+ !N1 & NOT EV5 A BAD ONE1 HAV+ GOOD 9T5TIONS4 ,I WAS WALK+ 9 ! P>K ) ,ADAM :5 A WELL-DRESS$ WOMAN ) AN UNUSUALLY K9D1 PLEASANT1 SMIL+1 & EXCIT$ FACE CAME D[N A SIDE-PA?4 ,%E APPROA*$ ME QUICKLY1 FELL ON H] KNEES1 SEIZ$ MY H&1 & BEGAN KISS+ IT4 

',MY DE>1 Y\R ,HI<NESS6 ,N[1 ,GOD HAS GRANT$--' 

',:O >E Y\8' 

',Y\R NURSE1 ,AVDOTYA - ,DUNYA%A - ,I NURS$ Y\ ELEV5 MON?S4 ,GOD GRANTS ME TO SEE Y\ AGA94' 

,I RAIS$ H] ) DIFFICULTY1 ASK$ :]E %E LIV$1 & PROMIS$ TO GO TO SEE H]4 ,! DELI<TFUL HOME LIFE 9 H] CLEAN LITTLE H\SE1 H] SWEET DAU<T]1 MY FO/]-SI/] - A G5U9E ,RUSSIAN BEAUTY 5GAG$ TO ONE ( ! ,C\RT GROOMS1 - MY NURSE'S HUSB&1 ! G>D5]1 JU/ AS SMIL+ AS HIS WIFE1 & !IR CR[D ( SMIL+ *ILDR5 SEEM$ TO LI<T UP ! D>KNESS >\ND ME4 ',H]E IS TRUE LIFE1 REAL HAPP9ESS6' ?\<T ,I4 ',IT IS ALL SO SIMPLE1 SO CLE>4 ,NO 9TRIGUES1 JEAL\SIES1 OR QU>RELS4' 

,IT WAS ?IS AMIABLE ,DUNYA%A :O NURS$ ME4 ,MY HEAD NURSE WAS ,SOPHIA ,IVANOVNA ,B5K5DORF1 A ,G]MAN2 & ! SECOND NURSE WAS AN ,5GLI%WOMAN NAM$ ,HESSL]4 ,SOPHIA ,IVANOVNA ,B5K5DORF WAS A /\T1 :ITE-SK9N$1 /RAI<T-NOS$ WOMAN1 ( MAJE/IC APPE>ANCE :5 GIV+ ORD]S 9 ! NURS]Y BUT SURPRIS+LY S]VILE 9 GR&MO!R'S PRES5CE - B[+ & CURTSY+ L[ TO H] :O WAS A HEAD %ORT] ?AN H]SELF4 ,%E WAS V]Y OBSEQUI\S TO ME & YET SEV]E4 ,SOMETIMES %E WAS A QUE51 9 H] BROAD SKIRTS & ) H] MAJE/IC /RAI<T-NOS$ FACE1 & !N SUDD5LY %E BECAME AN AFFECT$ Y\NG HUSSY4 

,PRASKOVYA ,IVANOVNA ,HESSL]1.<#a#f.> MY ,5GLI% NURSE1 WAS A LONG-FAC$1 R$-HAIR$1 S]I\S ,5GLI%WOMAN2 BUT :5 %E SMIL$ H] :OLE FACE BEAM$ SO ?AT ONE C\LD NOT HELP SMIL+ ) H]4 ,I LIK$ H] TID9ESS1 H] EQUANIMITY1 H] CLEANL9ESS1 & H] G5TLE FIRMNESS4 ,IT SEEM$ AS IF %E KNEW SOME?+ NOBODY ELSE KNEW - NEI!R MY MO!R1 NOR MY FA!R1 NOR EV5 MY GR&MO!R H]SELF4 

,MY MO!R ,I FIR/ RECOLLECT AS A /RANGE1 SAD1 SUP]NATURAL & *>M+ VISION4 ,H&SOME1 ELEGANT1 GLITT]+ ) DIAMONDS1 SILKS1 & LACES1 & ) H] R\ND1 :ITE >MS B>E1 %E W\LD 5T] MY ROOM1 & ) A /RANGE1 MELAN*OLY EXPRESSION ON H] FACE1 ALI5 TO ME & HAV+ NO REF]5CE TO ME1 W\LD C>ESS ME1 TAKE ME UP 9 H] /RONG BEAUTIFUL >MS1 LIFT ME TO H] /ILL MORE BEAUTIFUL FACE1 & %AK+ BACK H] ?ICK1 SC5T$ HAIR1 W\LD KISS ME & CRY1 & ONCE %E EV5 LET ME SLIP FROM H] >MS & FELL D[N 9 A FA9T4 

,IT IS /RANGE1 BUT :E!R BY MY GR&MO!R'S 9FLU5CE1 OR AS A RESULT ( MY MO!R'S BEHAVIOR TO ME1 OR BECAUSE ) A *ILD'S QUICK 9/9CT ,I WAS AW>E ( ! 9TRIGUES ?AT C5T]$ >\ND ME1 IT SO HAPP5$ ?AT ,I HAD NO SIMPLE FEEL+1 OR 9DE$ ANY FEEL+1 ( LOVE = MY MO!R4 ,I FELT SOME?+ /RA9$ 9 H] TREATM5T ( ME4 ,%E SEEM$ TO BE P>AD+ H]SELF ?R\< ME1 OBLIVI\S ( ME1 & ,I FELT IT4 ,SO IT REALLY WAS4 ,MY GR&MO!R TOOK ME FROM MY P>5TS 5TIRELY 9TO H] [N H&S1 9 ORD] TO PASS ! CR[N ON TO ME & TO DIS9H]IT H] SON1 MY UN=TUNATE FA!R1 :OM %E HAT$4 ,( C\RSE ,I KNEW NO?+ AB\T ?IS TILL LONG AFT]2 BUT FROM MY E>LIE/ CONSCI\SNESS1 )\T UND]/&+ ! REASON1 ,I WAS AW>E ( BE+ ! OBJECT ( SOME 5MITY & COMPETITION - A TOOL 9 SOME 9TRIGUE - & ,I WAS S5SIBLE ( A COLDNESS & 9DIFF]5CE TO MYSELF1 TO MY *ILDI% S\L :I* DESIR$ NO CR[N1 BUT ONLY SIMPLE LOVE :I* WAS LACK+4 ,!RE WAS MY MO!R1 ALWAYS SAD 9 MY PRES5CE4 ,ONCE :5 %E WAS SPEAK+ ,G]MAN TO ,SOPHIA ,IVANOVNA AB\T SOME?+1 %E BUR/ \T CRY+ & ALMO/ RAN \T ( ! ROOM ON HE>+ GR&MO!R'S FOOT/EPS4 ,!RE WAS MY FA!R1 :O SOMETIMES CAME TO \R ROOM1 & TO :OM1 LAT] ON1 MY BRO!R & ,I US$ TO BE TAK52 BUT AT ! SI<T ( ME MY UN=TUNATE FA!R EXPRESS$ HIS DISSATISFACTION & SUPPRESS$ ANG] TO A GREAT] EXT5T & MORE DECID$LY ?AN MY MO!R4 

,I REMEMB] BE+ TAK5 ) MY BRO!R ,CON/ANT9E TO \R P>5TS' P>T ( ! PALACE4 ,?IS WAS :5 MY FA!R WAS />T+ ON HIS J\RNEY ABROAD 9 #a#g#h#a4 ,HE SUDD5LY PU%$ ME ASIDE ) HIS H& & JUMP$ UP FROM HIS >M-*AIR ) A T]RIBLE LOOK 9 HIS EYES1 & 9 A *OK+ VOICE SAID SOME?+ AB\T ME & MY GR&MO!R4 ,I DID NOT UND]/& :AT IT WAS1 BUT REMEMB] ! WORDS1 ,APRES '#f#b T\T E/ POSSIBLE4.<#a#g.> ,I BECAME FRI<T5$ & BEGAN TO CRY4 ,MY MO!R TOOK ME ON H] >M & BEGAN KISS+ ME1 & !N C>RI$ ME TO HIM4 ,HE HURRI$LY GAVE ME HIS BLESS+ & RAN \T ( ! ROOM CLATT]+ ) HIS HI< HEELS4 ,LONG AFT]W>DS ,I CAME TO UND]/& ! MEAN+ ( ?AT \TBUR/4 ,HE & MY MO!R W]E />T+ TO TRAVEL AS ,COMTE ET ,COMTESSE DU ,NORD - MY GR&MO!R WI%$ !M TO DO SO - & HE WAS AFRAID ?AT DUR+ !IR ABS5CE HE W\LD BE DEPRIV$ ( HIS RI<T TO ! ?RONE & ,I %\LD BE APPO9T$ HEIR4444 ,OH1 MY ,GOD1 MY ,GOD6 ,HE PRIZ$ :AT RU9$ BO? HIM & ME PHYSICALLY & SPIRITUALLY - & ,I1 UN=TUNATE ?AT ,I WAS1 ALSO PRIZ$ IT6 

,SOMEONE HAS COME KNOCK+1 SAY+3 ',9 ! NAME ( ! ,FA!R & ( ! ,SON4' ,I HAVE ANSW]$ ',AM5'4 ,I WILL N[ PUT MY WRIT+ AWAY & GO & OP5 ! DOOR4 ,GOD WILL+1 ,I WILL CONT9UE TOMORR[4 

#a#c? ,DECEMB] - 

,I SLEPT LITTLE & HAD BAD DREAMS3 SOME UNPLEASANT & WEAK WOMAN WAS CL++ TO ME1 & ?\< ,I WAS NOT AFRAID ( H] OR ( S9N+1 ,I WAS AFRAID MY WIFE W\LD SEE IT & REPROA* ME AGA94 ,SEV5TY-TWO1 & ,I AM NOT FREE YET4 ,:5 AWAKE ONE CAN DECEIVE ONESELF1 BUT A DREAM GIVES A TRUE VALUATION ( ! /ATE ONE HAS ATTA9$ TO4 ,I ALSO DREAM$ - & ?IS AGA9 %[S ! L[ LEVEL ( MORALITY ON :I* ,I /& - ?AT SOMEONE HAD BR\<T ME H]E SOME SWEETMEATS WRAPP$ 9 MOSS - SOME UNUSUAL K9D ( SWEETMEATS - & WE PICK$ !M \T ( ! MOSS & DIVID$ !M4 ,BUT AFT] ! DIVISION SOME SWEETMEATS W]E LEFT OV] & ,I BEGAN PICK+ !M \T = MYSELF2 & JU/ !N A BLACK-EY$ & UNPLEASANT BOY1 SOME?+ LIKE ! ,SULTAN ( ,TURKEY'S SON1 /RET*$ \T T[>DS ! SWEETS & TOOK !M 9 HIS H&1 & ,I PU%$ HIM AWAY1 ?\< ,I KNEW ?AT IT IS MU* MORE NATURAL = A *ILD TO EAT SWEETS ?AN = ME TO DO SO4 ,I DID NOT LET HIM HAVE !M1 & KN[+ ?AT ?IS WAS WRONG FELT ILL WILL T[>DS HIM4 

,& /RANGELY 5\< A SIMIL> ?+ REALLY HAPP5$ TO ME TODAY4 ,M>YA ,M>TEMYANOVNA CAME4 ,YE/]DAY A MESS5G] FROM H] HAD KNOCK$ AT MY DOOR ASK+ IF %E MI<T COME4 ,I SAID %E MI<T4 ,!SE VISITS >E TRY+ TO ME1 BUT ,I KNEW ?AT A REFUSAL W\LD HURT H]4 ,SO %E CAME TODAY4 ,! RUNN]S ( H] SL$GE C\LD BE HE>D 9 ! DI/ANCE SQUEAK+ OV] ! SN[4 ,& :5 %E 5T]$ 9 H] FUR CLOAK & SEV]AL %AWLS1 %E BR\<T 9 SOME BAGS ( EATABLES 7DUMPL+S1 ,L5T5 OIL1 & APPLES71 & SO MU* COLD AIR ?AT ,I HAD TO PUT ON MY DRESS+-G[N4 ,%E CAME TO ASK MY ADVICE3 :E!R TO LET H] DAU<T] M>RY A RI* WID[] :O IS WOO+ H]4 ,!IR BELIEF 9 MY SAGACITY IS V]Y TRY+ TO ME1 & ALL ,I SAY TO CORRECT IT !Y ATTRIBUTE TO MY HUMILITY4 ,I SAID :AT ,I ALWAYS SAY3 ?AT *A/ITY IS BETT] ?AN M>RIAGE1 BUT1 AS ,/ ,PAUL SAYS1 IT IS BETT] TO M>RY ?AN TO LU/4 ,) H] CAME H] SON-9-LAW ,NIKANOR ,IVANOVI* - ! ONE :O 9VIT$ ME TO COME & LIVE 9 HIS H\SE & :O HAS S9CE UNCEAS+LY PE/]$ ME ) HIS VISITS4 

,NIKANOR ,IVANOVI* IS A GREAT TRIAL TO ME4 ,I CANNOT OV]COME MY ANTIPA?Y & AV]SION = HIM4 ',O ,LORD1 GRANT ME TO SEE MY [N 9IQUITIES & NOT TO JUDGE MY BRO!R-MAN4' ,BUT ,I SEE ALL HIS FAULTS1 DISC]N !M ) ! P5ETRATION ( MALIGNITY1 SEE ALL HIS WEAKNESSES1 & CANNOT CONQU] MY ANTIPA?Y = HIM - MY BRO!R-MAN1 :O LIKE MYSELF PROCE$S FROM ,GOD4 

,:AT DO SU* FEEL+S MEAN8 ,I HAVE EXP]I5C$ !M MORE ?AN ONCE 9 MY LONG LIFE4 ,MY TWO /RONGE/ AV]SIONS W]E = ,L\IS ,X,V,I,I,I1 ) HIS BIG /OMA*1 HOOK$ NOSE1 REPULSIVE :ITE H&S1 & HIS SELF-CONFID5CE1 9SOL5CE1 & OBTUS5ESS - !RE1 ,I CANNOT KEEP FROM CRITICIZ+ HIM - & ! O!R ANTIPA?Y IS = ?IS ,NIKANOR ,IVANOVI* :O TORM5T$ ME = TWO H\RS YE/]DAY4 ,EV]Y?+ AB\T HIM1 FROM ! S\ND ( HIS VOICE TO HIS HAIR & HIS NAILS1 EVOKES REPULSION 9 ME1 & TO EXPLA9 MY GLOOM9ESS TO ,M>YA ,M>TEMYANOVNA ,I TOLD H] A LIE1 SAY+ ?AT ,I WAS NOT WELL4 ,AFT] !Y HAD GONE ,I PRAY$1 & AFT] ! PRAY] ,I GREW CALM4 ,I ?ANK ,Y\1 ,O ,LORD1 ?AT ! ONE & ONLY ?+ ,I NE$ IS 9 MY [N P[]4 ,I REMEMB]$ ?AT ,NIKANOR ,IVANOVI* HAD BE5 AN 9FANT & ?AT HE W\LD DIE4 ,I RECALL$ ! SAME ) REF]5CE TO ,L\IS ,X,V,I,I,I1 KN[+ HIM TO BE ALREADY DEAD1 & ,I REGRETT$ ?AT ,NIKANOR ,IVANOVI* WAS NO LONG] H]E ?AT ,I MI<T EXPRESS MY GOODWILL TO HIM4 

,M>YA ,M>TEMYANOVNA BR\<T ME SOME C&LES SO ?AT ,I CAN WRITE 9 ! EV5+S4 ,I W5T \T4 ,TO ! LEFT ! BRI<T />S HAVE DISAPPE>$ 9 A WOND]FUL AURORA BOREALIS4 ,H[ BEAUTIFUL1 H[ BEAUTIFUL6 ,BUT N[ ,I WILL CONT9UE4 

,MY FA!R & MO!R HAD GONE ABROAD1 & ,I & MY BRO!R ,CON/ANT9E1 BORN TWO YE>S AFT] ME1 W]E 9 \R GR&MO!R'S COMPLETE CONTROL = ! :OLE ( !IR ABS5CE4 ,MY BRO!R HAD BE5 NAM$ ,CON/ANT9E TO D5OTE ?AT HE WAS TO BECOME ,EMP]OR ( ,CON/ANT9OPLE4 

,*ILDR5 LOVE EV]YBODY & ESPECIALLY ?OSE :O LOVE & C>ESS !M4 ,MY GR&MO!R C>ESS$ & PRAIS$ ME1 & ,I LOV$ H] 9 SPITE ( ! SMELL1 REPULSIVE TO ME1 :I* ALWAYS HUNG AB\T H]1 NOT)/&+ H] P]FUMES1 & WAS ESPECIALLY NOTICEABLE :5 %E TOOK ME ON H] LAP4 ,H] H&S TOO W]E UNPLEASANT TO ME - CLEAN1 YELL[I%1 %RIVEL$1 SLIPP]Y1 & %9Y1 ) F+]S B5T 9W>DS & ) LONG NAILS FROM :I* ! SK9 HAD BE5 PU%$ BACK UNNATURALLY F>4 ,H] EYES W]E DULL1 WE>Y1 ALMO/ LIFELESS1 & ?IS TOGE!R ) H] SMIL+1 TOO?LESS M\?1 CREAT$ A PA9FUL ?\< NOT EXACTLY REPULSIVE IMPRESSION4 ,I ATTRIBUT$ ?AT EXPRESSION ( H] EYES - :I* ,I N[ REMEMB] ) LOA?+ - TO H] EX]TIONS ON BEHALF ( H] PEOPLE1 AS IT WAS EXPLA9$ TO ME1 & ,I PITI$ H] = ?AT LANGUID EXPRESSION4 ,ONCE OR TWICE ,I SAW ,POTEMK9.<#a#h.> - A ONE-EY$1 SQU9T+1 5ORM\S1 D>K1 P]SPIR+1 & DIRTY MAN :O WAS T]RIBLE4 ,HE SEEM$ TO ME P>TICUL>LY T]RIBLE BECAUSE HE ALONE WAS NOT AFRAID ( GR&MO!R1 BUT SPOKE L\D 9 H] PRES5CE 9 HIS BELL[+ VOICE1 & BOLDLY C>ESS$ & TEAS$ ME1 ?\< ADDRESS+ ME AS 'Y\R ,HI<NESS'4 

,AMONG ?OSE ,I SAW ) H] 9 MY E>LY *ILDHOOD WAS ,LANSKOY4.<#a#i.> ,HE WAS ALWAYS ) H] & EV]YBODY NOTIC$ HIM & PAID C\RT TO HIM4 ,MY GR&MO!R ESPECIALLY LOOK$ BACK AT HIM CONT9UALLY4 ,( C\RSE ,I DID NOT !N UND]/& :AT IT MEANT1 & ,LANSKOY PLEAS$ ME V]Y MU*4 ,I LIK$ HIS CURLS1 HIS H&SOME ?I<S 9 TI<TLY /RET*$ ELK-SK9 BREE*ES1 HIS WELL-%AP$ CALVES1 HIS M]RY C>ELESS SMILE1 & ! DIAMONDS ?AT GLITT]$ ALL OV] HIM4 

,IT WAS A V]Y M]RY TIME4 ,WE W]E TAK5 TO ,TS>SKOE ,SELO1 :]E WE BOAT$1 DUG 9 ! G>D51 W5T = WALKS1 & RODE ON HORSEBACK4 ,CON/ANT9E1 PLUMP1 R$-HAIR$1 UN PETIT ,BAC*US1 AS GR&MO!R CALL$ HIM1 AMUS$ EV]YBODY BY HIS TRICKS1 HIS BOLDNESS1 & HIS DEVICES4 ,HE MIMICK$ EV]YBODY1 9CLUD+ ,SOPHIA ,IVANOVNA & EV5 GR&MO!R H]SELF4 

,! MO/ IMPORTANT EV5T ( ?AT TIME WAS ,SOPHIA ,IVANOVNA ,B5K5DORF'S DEA?4 ,IT HAPP5$ ONE EV5+ AT ,TS>SKOE ,SELO1 9 GR&MO!R'S PRES5CE4 ,SOPHIA ,IVANOVNA HAD JU/ BR\<T US 9 AFT] D9N] & WAS SMIL+LY SAY+ SOME?+1 :5 H] FACE SUDD5LY BECAME GRAVE1 %E REEL$1 LEANT AGA9/ ! DOOR1 SLIPP$1 & FELL HEAVILY4 ,PEOPLE CAME RUNN+ 9 & WE W]E TAK5 AWAY4 ,BUT NEXT DAY WE LE>N$ ?AT %E WAS DEAD4 ,I CRI$ = A LONG TIME & WAS DEPRESS$ & NOT MYSELF4 ,EV]YBODY ?\<T ,I WAS CRY+ AB\T ,SOPHIA ,IVANOVNA1 BUT IT WAS NOT = H] ?AT ,I CRI$1 BUT ?AT PEOPLE %\LD DIE - ?AT DEA? %\LD EXI/4 ,I C\LD NOT UND]/& & C\LD NOT BELIEVE ?AT IT WAS ! FATE ( EV]YBODY4 ,I REMEMB] ?AT 9 MY *ILDI%1 FIVE-YE>-OLD S\L ! QUE/IONS1 ,:AT IS DEA?8 &1 ,:AT IS LIFE :I* 5DS 9 DEA?8 !N >OSE 9 !IR FULL SIGNIFICANCE - ?OSE *IEF QUE/IONS :I* CONFRONT ALL MANK9D & TO :I* ! WISE SEEK & F9D REPLIES1 & :I* ! FRIVOL\S TRY TO ?RU/ ASIDE & =GET4 ,I DID :AT WAS NATURAL = A *ILD1 ESPECIALLY 9 ! WORLD 9 :I* ,I LIV$3 ,I PUT ! QUE/ION ASIDE1 =GOT AB\T DEA?1 LIV$ AS IF IT DID NOT EXI/1 & HAVE LIV$ TILL IT HAS BECOME T]RIBLE TO ME4 

,ANO!R IMPORTANT EV5T CONNECT$ ) ,SOPHIA ,IVANOVNA'S DEA? WAS \R BE+ TRANSF]R$ TO ! *>GE ( A MAN1 & ,NI*OLAS ,IVANOVI* ,SALTYKOV BE+ APPO9T$ \R TUTOR - NOT ! ,SALTYKOV :O 9 ALL PROBABILITY WAS \R GR&FA!R1 BUT ,NI*OLAS ,IVANOVI* :O WAS 9 S]VICE AT MY FA!R'S C\RT2 A LITTLE MAN ) A HUGE HEAD & A /UPID FACE ) A CONT9UAL GRIMACE1 :I* MY LITTLE BRO!R ,CON/ANT9E IMITAT$ WOND]FULLY4 ,BE+ 5TRU/$ TO A MAN GRIEV$ ME1 BECAUSE IT MEANT P>T+ FROM MY DE> NURSE1 ,PRASKOVYA ,IVANOVNA4 

,?OSE :O HAVE NOT ! MIS=TUNE TO BE BORN 9 A ROYAL FAMILY MU/1 ,I ?9K1 F9D IT DIFFICULT TO REALIZE H[ DI/ORT$ IS ! VIEW ( PEOPLE & ( \R RELATION T[>DS !M :I* IS 9/ILL$ 9TO US & WAS 9/ILL$ 9TO ME4 ,9/EAD ( ! FEEL+ ( DEP5D5CE ON GR[N-UP & OLD] P]SONS NATURAL TO A *ILD1 9/EAD ( GRATITUDE = ALL ! BLESS+S :I* WE 5JOY$1 WE W]E L$ TO BELIEVE ?AT WE W]E SOME K9D ( EXCEPTIONAL BE+S :O NOT ONLY \<T TO BE SUPPLI$ ) ALL ! GOOD ?+S A HUMAN BE+ CAN HAVE1 BUT BY A WORD OR A SMILE ALONE W\LD NOT ONLY MORE ?AN PAY = ALL ?OSE BLESS+S1 BUT W\LD ALSO REW>D PEOPLE & MAKE !M HAPPY4 ,IT IS TRUE ?AT WE W]E EXPECT$ TO TREAT PEOPLE POLITELY1 BUT ) MY *ILDI% 9/9CT ,I REALIZ$ ?AT ?IS WAS ONLY = %[1 & WAS DONE NOT = ! SAKE ( ! PEOPLE TO :OM WE HAD TO BE POLITE BUT = \R [N SAKE1 SO ?AT \R GR&EUR %\LD BE /ILL MORE NOTICEABLE4 

,ONE FETE-DAY WE W]E DRIV+ ALONG ! ,NEVSKI ,PROSPECT 9 AN 5ORM\S L&AU3 WE TWO BRO!RS & ,NI*OLAS ,IVANOVI* ,SALTYKOV4 ,WE SAT 9 ! *IEF SEATS4 ,TWO P[D]$ FOOTM5 9 R$ LIV]IES /OOD BEH9D4 ,IT WAS A BRI<T SPR+ DAY4 ,I WORE AN UNBUTTON$ UNI=M ) A :ITE WAI/COAT & ! BLUE ,/ ,&REW'S RIBBON ACROSS IT4 ,CON/ANT9E WAS DRESS$ 9 ! SAME WAY2 ON \R HEADS WE WORE PLUM$ HATS :I* WE CONT9UALLY RAIS$ AS WE B[$4 ,! PEOPLE EV]Y:]E /OPP$ & B[$2 SOME ( !M RAN AFT] US4 ',ON V\S SALUE1'.<#b.> ,NI*OLAS ,IVANOVI* KEPT REPEAT+4 ',A DROITE4'.<#b#a.> 

,WE W5T PA/ ! GU>D-H\SE & ! GU>DS RAN \T4 ,?OSE ,I ALWAYS NOTIC$1 = ,I LOV$ SOLDI]S & MILIT>Y EX]CISES FROM MY *ILDHOOD4 ,WE W]E TOLD1 ESPECIALLY BY GR&MO!R - ! V]Y ONE :O BELIEV$ IT LEA/ ( ALL - ?AT ALL M5 >E EQUAL & ?AT WE \<T TO REMEMB] ?IS1 BUT ,I KNEW ?AT ?OSE :O SAID SO DID NOT BELIEVE IT4 

,I REMEMB] ONCE H[ ,SA%A ,GOLITZ91 :O WAS PLAY+ ) ME AT B>RICADES1 ACCID5TALLY KNOCK$ ME & HURT ME4 

',H[ D>E Y\6' 

',I DID NOT MEAN TO4 ,:AT DOES IT MATT]8' 

,I FELT ! BLOOD RU% TO MY HE>T ) VEXATION & ANG]4 ,I COMPLA9$ TO ,NI*OLAS ,IVANOVI* & WAS NOT A%AM$ :5 ,GOLITZ9 BEGG$ MY P>DON4 

,?AT IS 5\< = TODAY4 ,MY C&LE HAS BURNT L[ & ,I HAVE YET TO *OP /ICKS1 MY AX IS BLUNT & ,I HAVE NO?+ TO %>P5 IT ON1 BESIDES :I* ,I DON'T KN[ H[ TO4 

#a#f? ,DECEMB] - 

,I HAVE NOT WRITT5 = ?REE DAYS4 ,I WAS NOT WELL4 ,I HAVE BE5 READ+ ! ,GOSPEL BUT C\LD NOT >\SE 9 MYSELF ?AT UND]/&+ ( IT1 ?AT COMMUNION ) ,GOD1 :I* ,I EXP]I5C$ BE=E4 ,I US$ (T5 TO ?9K ?AT MAN CANNOT HELP HAV+ DESIRES4 ,I ALWAYS HAD & /ILL HAVE DESIRES4 ,FIR/ ,I WI%$ TO CONQU] ,NAPOLEON1 ,I WI%$ TO GIVE PEACE TO ,EUROPE1 ,I WI%$ TO BE RELEAS$ FROM MY CR[N3 & ALL MY WI%ES W]E EI!R FULFILL$ & AS SOON AS ?AT HAPP5$ CEAS$ TO ATTRACT ME1 OR BECAME IMPOSSIBLE ( FULFILLM5T & ,I CEAS$ TO WI% = !M4 ,BUT :ILE MY WI%ES W]E BE+ FULFILL$ OR BECOM+ IMPOSSIBLE1 NEW WI%ES >OSE1 & SO IT W5T ON & GOES ON TO ! 5D4 ,I WI%$ = ! W9T] - IT HAS COME2 ,I WI%$ = SOLITUDE - & HAVE ALMO/ ATTA9$ IT2 N[ ,I WI% TO DESCRIBE MY LIFE1 & TO DO IT 9 ! BE/ WAY POSSIBLE1 ?AT IT MAY BE ( USE TO O!RS4 ,& :E!R ?IS WI% IS FULFILL$ OR NOT1 NEW WI%ES WILL AWAK54 ,LIFE CONSI/S 9 ?AT4 ,& IT OCCURS TO ME ?AT IF ! :OLE ( LIFE CONSI/S 9 ! BIR? ( WI%ES & ! JOY ( LIFE LIES 9 !IR FULFILLM5T1 !N IS !RE A WI% :I* W\LD BE NATURAL TO MAN1 TO EV]Y HUMAN BE+1 ALWAYS1 & W\LD ALWAYS BE FULFILL$ OR RA!R W\LD BE APPROA*+ FULFILLM5T8 ,& IT HAS BECOME CLE> TO ME ?AT ?IS W\LD BE SO = A MAN :O DESIR$ DEA?4 ,HIS :OLE LIFE W\LD BE AN APPROA* TO ! FULFILLM5T ( ?AT WI% & ! WI% W\LD C]TA9LY BE FULFILL$4 

,AT FIR/ ?IS SEEM$ /RANGE TO ME4 ,BUT HAV+ CONSID]$ IT ,I SUDD5LY SAW ?AT IT REALLY IS SO2 ?AT IT IS 9 ?IS ALONE1 9 ! APPROA*+ T[>D DEA?1 IS ! ONLY REASONABLE WI% A MAN CAN HAVE4 ,A WI% NOT = DEA? ITSELF1 BUT = ! MOVEM5T ( LIFE :I* LEADS TO DEA?4 ,?AT MOVEM5T CONSI/S 9 A RELEASE ( ?AT SPIRITUAL ELEM5T :I* DWELLS 9 EV]Y MAN FROM PASSIONS & TEMPTATIONS4 ,I FEEL ?IS N[ - HAV+ FRE$ MYSELF FROM MO/ ( ! ?+S ?AT US$ TO HIDE FROM ME :AT IS ESS5TIAL 9 MY S\L1 US$ TO HIDE ,GOD - ITS ON5ESS ) ,GOD4 ,I >RIV$ AT IT UNCONSCI\SLY4 ,BUT IF ,I PLAC$ MY WELF>E FIR/ 7& ?IS IS NOT ONLY POSSIBLE1 BUT IS :AT \<T TO BE7 & CONSID]$ MY HI<E/ WELF>E TO LIE 9 LIB]ATION FROM PASSIONS & AN APPROA* T[>DS ,GOD1 !N EV]Y?+ ?AT BR\<T ME NE>] TO DEA? - OLD AGE1 & ILLNESS - W\LD BE A FULFILLM5T ( MY ONE GREAT DESIRE4 ,?AT IS SO1 & ,I FEEL IT :5 ,I AM WELL4 ,BUT :5 ,I HAVE 9DIGE/ION1 AS WAS ! CASE YE/]DAY & ! DAY BE=E1 ,I CANNOT AWAK5 ?AT FEEL+1 & ?\< ,I DO NOT RESI/ DEA? ,I AM UNABLE TO WI% TO DRAW NE>] TO IT4 ,WELL1 SU* A CONDITION IS ONE ( SPIRITUAL SLEEP4 ,ONE HAS TO WAIT QUIETLY4  

,I WILL N[ GO ON FROM :]E ,I LEFT (F4 ,:AT ,I WRITE AB\T MY *ILDHOOD ,I REC\NT MA9LY FROM HE>SAY1 & (T5 :AT WAS TOLD ME AB\T MYSELF GETS MIX$ UP ) :AT ,I EXP]I5C$2 SO ?AT ,I SOMETIMES DO NOT KN[ :AT ,I MYSELF EXP]I5C$ & :AT ,I HE>D FROM O!RS4 

,MY :OLE LIFE FROM MY BIR? TO MY PRES5T OLD AGE MAKES ME ?9K ( A PLACE 5VELOP$ 9 A ?ICK MI/1 OR EV5 ( ! BATTLEFIELD AT ,DRESD53 EV]Y?+ IS HIDD51 NO?+ VISIBLE1 & SUDD5LY H]E & !RE LITTLE ISL&S OP5 \T1 DES ECLAIRCIES.<#b#b.> 9 :I* ONE SEES PEOPLE & OBJECTS UNCONNECT$ ) ANY?+ ELSE & SURR\ND$ ON ALL SIDES BY AN IMP5ETRABLE CURTA94 ,SU* >E MY *ILDI% RECOLLECTIONS4 ,= ! TIME ( MY *ILDHOOD !SE ECLAIRCIES V]Y V]Y R>ELY OP5 \T AMID ! SEA ( MI/ OR SMOKE1 AFT]W>DS !Y OCCUR MORE & MORE FREQU5TLY2 BUT EV5 N[ ,I HAVE TIMES ?AT LEAVE NO MEMORIES BEH9D4 ,9 *ILDHOOD !RE >E V]Y FEW MEMORIES1 & ! F>!R BACK ! FEW] !RE >E4 

,I HAVE SPOK5 ( ! CLE>+S ?AT BELONG TO MY E>LY LIFE3 ,SOPHIA ,B5K5DORF'S DEA?1 ! GOOD-BYE TO MY P>5TS1 & ,CON/ANT9E'S MIMICK+1 BUT SEV]AL O!R MEMORIES ( ?AT P]IOD OP5 \T N[ AS ,I ?9K ( ! PA/4 ,= 9/ANCE1 ,I DON'T AT ALL REMEMB] :5 ,KO/YA.<#b#c.> APPE>$ & WE BEGAN TO LIVE TOGE!R2 BUT ,I WELL REMEMB] H[ ONCE :5 ,I WAS SEV5 & HE FIVE WE W5T TO B$ AFT] S]VICE ON ,*RI/MAS EVE & TAK+ ADVANTAGE ( ! FACT ?AT EV]YBODY HAD LEFT \R ROOM1 WE GOT 9TO ONE B$ TOGE!R4 ,KO/YA 9 HIS LITTLE %IRT CLIMB$ OV] TO ME & WE BEGAN PLAY+ A M]RY GAME :I* CONSI/$ 9 SLAPP+ ONE ANO!R ON \R B>E BODIES2 & WE LAU<$ TILL \R /OMA*S A*$ & W]E V]Y HAPPY1 :5 SUDD5LY ,NI*OLAS ,IVANOVI*1 ) HIS HUGE P[D]$ HEAD1 5T]$ WE>+ HIS EMBROID]$ COAT & HIS ORD]S1 & RU%$ T[>DS US ) />+ EYES1 9 HORROR :I* ,I C\LD NOT AT ALL EXPLA9 TO MYSELF1 & SEP>AT$ US & ANGRILY PROMIS$ TO PUNI% US & TO TELL \R GR&MO!R4 

,ANO!R OCCURR5CE ,I WELL REMEMB] HAPP5$ RA!R LATE - :5 ,I WAS AB\T N9E2 IT WAS AN 5C\NT] 9 GR&MO!R'S ROOM1 & ALMO/ 9 \R PRES5CE1 BETWE5 ,ALEXEY ,GRIGORE-VI* ,ORLOV  & ,POTEMK94 ,IT WAS NOT LONG BE=E GR&MO!R'S J\RNEY TO ! ,CRIMEA & \R FIR/ J\RNEY TO ,MOSC[4 ,NI*OLAS ,IVANOVI* HAD TAK5 US AS USUAL TO SEE GR&MO!R4 ,! L>GE ROOM1 ! CEIL+ ( :I* WAS ORNAM5T$ ) /UCCO-WORK & PA9T+S1 WAS FULL ( PEOPLE4 ,GR&MO!R'S HAIR HAD ALREADY BE5 DONE4 ,IT WAS COMB$ BACK FROM ! =EHEAD & V]Y SKILLFULLY >RANG$ ON ! TEMPLES4 ,%E SAT AT H] DRESS+-TABLE 9 A :ITE P[D]-MANTLE4 ,H] MAID /OOD BEH9D H] ADJU/+ H] HAIR4 ,%E LOOK$ AT US ) A SMILE1 CONT9U+ H] CONV]SATION ) A BIG1 TALL1 & /\T ,G5]AL DECORAT$ ) ! RIBBON ( ,/ ,&REW1 :O HAD A T]RIBLE SC> ACROSS HIS *EEK FROM M\? TO E>4 ,?IS WAS ,ORLOV1 ',LE BALAFRE'4  ,IT WAS !RE ,I SAW HIM = ! FIR/ TIME4 ,GR&MO!R'S ,&]SON H>E-H\NDS W]E BESIDE H]1 & MY FAVORITE ,MIMI JUMP$ UP FROM H] SKIRT & LEAP+ AT ME PUT ITS FEET ON MY %\LD]S & LICK$ MY FACE4 ,WE CAME UP TO GR&MO!R & KISS$ H] :ITE1 PLUMP H&4 ,%E TURN$ IT R\ND & H] B5T F+]S CAU<T MY FACE & C>ESS$ ME4 ,9 SPITE ( H] P]FUMES ,I WAS AW>E ( H] DISAGREEABLE SMELL4 ,%E W5T ON LOOK+ AT ,BALAFRE & SPEAK+ TO HIM4 

',A F9E FELL[1' %E SAID1 ) H] /RONG ,G]MAN ACC5T1 PO9T+ TO ME1 'Y\ HAD NOT SE5 HIM BE=E4' 

',!Y >E BO? F9E FELL[S1' SAID ! C\NT1 KISS+ MY H& & ,CON/ANT9E'S4 

',IT'S ALL RI<T1 IT'S ALL RI<T1' %E SAID TO H] MAID :O WAS PUTT+ H] CAP ON = H]4 ,?AT MAID WAS ,M>YA ,/EPANOVNA1 PA9T$ R$ & :ITE1 A K9DHE>T$ WOMAN :O ALWAYS C>ESS$ ME4 

',\ E/ MA TABATI]E8'  

,LANSKOY CAME UP & H&$ H] AN OP5 SNUFF-BOX4 ,GR&MO!R TOOK A P9* & LOOK$ AT H] JE/] ,MATR5A ,DANILOVNA1 :O WAS APPROA*+ H]4444 

7,! /ORY BREAKS (F H]E2 IT WAS LEFT 9 ?IS UNF9I%$ /ATE :5 ,TOL/OY DI$47 

#aie 

8 ,A TRAD+ PORT ON ! ,SEA ( ,AZOV4 

8 ,PRESUMABLY /&+ = ',ALEX&] ,PAVLOVI*' 7,ALEX&]1 SON ( ,PAUL74 

8 ,IVAN ,GRIGOREVI* ,LATY%EV - A PEASANT ( ! VILLAGE ( ,KRASNORE*9SK1 :OM ,F$OR ,KUZMI* MET & BECAME ACQUA9T$ ) 9 #a#h#c#i1 & :O1 AFT] ! LATT] HAD LIV$ 9 V>I\S PLACES1 BUILT HIM A CELL 9 A WOOD AWAY FROM ! ROAD1 ON A HILL ABOVE A CLIFF4 ,9 ?IS CELL ,KUZMI* BEGAN HIS DI>Y4 ,L4 ,T4 

8 ',A =TUNATE ACCID5T4' 

8 ,FOTI 7#a#g#i#b-#a#h#c#h74 ,AN >*IM&RITE :O 5JOY$ MU* 9FLU5CE 9 C\RT CIRCLES4 

8 ,G4 ,F4 VON ,P>ROT 7#a#g#f#g-#a#h#e#b71 ,MEMB] ( ! ,RUSSIAN ,ACADEMY ( ,SCI5CE4 ,HIS LETT]S TO ,ALEX&] ,I W]E PUBLI%$ 9 #a#h#i#d-#e4 

8 ,B>ONESS ,B4 ,J4 ,KRUD5] 7#a#g#f#d-#a#h#b#d71 PIETI/ & AU?ORESS1 AT ONE TIME A FRI5D ( ,ALEX&] ,I4 

8 ,! EXCE$+LY H>% ,M9I/] TO :OM ,ALEX&] 5TRU/$ ! GOV]NM5T :5 HE HIMSELF BEGAN TO CEASE TO EX]CISE P[]4 

8 ,! GR&MO!R WAS ,CA!R9E ! ,GREAT4 ,! FA!R WAS H] HALF-MAD SON1 AFT]W>DS ! ,EMP]OR ,PAUL1 :O WAS ASSASS9AT$4 

8 ,M>YA ,ANTONOVNA ,N>Y%K9A1 AT ONE TIME ,ALEX&] ,I'S MI/RESS4 

8 ,! ,PR9CES ,GAG>9 >E A FAM\S ,RUSSIAN FAMILY4 

8 ,FIELD-,M>%AL ,PR9CE ,P4 ,M4 ,VOLKONSKI1 ,M9I/] ( ! ,PALACE4 

8 ,G5]AL ,C\NT ,DIEBITS*1 A ,G]MAN BY BIR?1 ,*IEF ( ! ,RUSSIAN ,G5]AL ,/AFF4 ,HE CON/ANTLY ACCOMPANI$ ,ALEX&] ,I4 

8 ,! DAY ( HIS PATRON-SA9T1 :I* IS KEPT LIKE AN ,5GLI% BIR?DAY4 

8 #i? ,NOVEMB] #ahbe O4S4 "7 #b#a/ ,NOVEMB]1 N4S4 

8 ,IT WAS CU/OM>Y 9 ,RUSSIA = PEOPLE ( O!R NATIONALITIES TO ADOPT A ,RUSSIAN ,*RI/IAN NAME & PATRONYMIC1 SO 9 ?IS CASE ,MISS ,HESSL] ASSUM$ ! NAMES ,PRASKOVYA ,IVANOVNA4 

8 ',AFT] '#f#b EV]Y?+ IS POSSIBLE4' ,! ,EMP]OR ,PET] ,I,I,I1 ,CA!R9E'S HUSB&1 HAD BE5 DE?RON$ BY A CONSPIRACY & MURD]$1 9 ,JULY #a#g#f#b4 

8 ,FIELD-,M>%AL ,C\NT ,G4 ,A4 ,POTEMK9 7#a#g#c#i-#i#a74 ,= A LONG TIME ! MO/ 9FLU5TIAL ( ,CA!R9E'S FAVORITES4 

8 ,C\NT ,A4 ,D4 ,LANSKOY 7#a#g#e#d-#h#d71 A ,G5]AL & A FAVORITE ( ,CA!R9E ,I,I4 

8 ',!Y >E B[+ TO Y\4' 

8 ',ON ! RI<T4' 

8 ,CLE>+S4 

8 ,A PET NAME = ,CON/ANT9E4 

7,S\RCE3 ,ORIG9ALLY TRANSLAT$ BY ,AYLM] ,MAUDE @& ,NIGEL ,J4 ,COOP]4 ,PRO(READ BY ,E>?LY,FIRE,FLIES4ORG1 #b#b47 

,FROM 3 ,WIKIS\RCE4ORG4 

,*RONOLOGY 3 
,NOVEMB] #c1 #aid 3 ,PO/HUM\S ,NOTES ( ! ,H]MIT ,F$OR ,KUZMI* -- ,PUBLICATION4 
,JUNE #b#a1 #bba 3 ,PO/HUM\S ,NOTES ( ! ,H]MIT ,F$OR ,KUZMI* -- ,ADD$4 
,JANU>Y #i1 #bbb 3 ,PO/HUM\S ,NOTES ( ! ,H]MIT ,F$OR ,KUZMI* -- ,UPDAT$4 

 FILE G5]AT$ FROM 3  
HTTP3_/_/REVOLTLIB4COM_/