,P>T #b1 ,*APT] #b 
,! ,WILL TO ,LIVE 

#aiabaiab 

,PEOPLE 3 

,AU?OR 3 ,ALEX&] ,B]KMAN 

,TEXT 3 

,I 

,! DAYS DRAG 9T]M9ABLY 9 ! SEMI-D>KNESS ( ! CELL4 ,! GONG REGULATES MY EXI/5CE ) DEPRESS+ MONOTONY4 ,BUT ! T5OR ( MY ?\<TS HAS BE5 *ANG$ BY ! NOTE ( ! MY/]I\S CORRESPOND5T4 ,9 VA9 ,I HAVE BE5 WAIT+ = HIS APPE>ANCE1-YET ! SUGGE/ION ( ESCAPE HAS G]M9AT$ HOPE4 ,! WILL TO LIVE IS BEG9N+ TO ASS]T ITSELF1 GR[+ MORE IMP]ATIVE AS ! DAYS GO BY4 ,I WOND] ?AT MY M9D DWELLS UPON SUICIDE MORE & MORE R>ELY1 EV] MORE CURSORILY4 ,! ?\<T ( SELF-DE/RUCTION FILLS ME ) DISMAY4 ,EV]Y POSSIBILITY ( ESCAPE MU/ FIR/ BE EXHAU/$1 ,I REASSURE ,M,Y TR\BL$ CONSCI5CE4 ,SURELY ,I HAVE NO FE> ( DEA?-:5 ! PROP] TIME >RIVES4 ,BUT HA/E W\LD BE HI<LY IMPRUD5T2 WORSE1 QUITE UNNECESS>Y4 9DE$1 IT IS MY DUTY AS A REVOLUTIONI/ TO SEIZE EV]Y OPPORTUNITY = PROPAG&A3 ESCAPE W\LD AF=D ME MANY OCCASIONS TO S]VE ! ,CAUSE4 IT WAS ?\<TLESS ON MY P>T TO CONDEMN ?AT MAN ,JAME/[N4 ,I EV5 RES5T$  HIS SEEM+LY UN=GIVABLE DELAY 9 COMMITT+ SUICIDE1 CONSID]+ ! IMPOSSIBLE S5T5CE ( SEV5TE5 YE>S4 ,9DE$1 ,I WAS UNJU/3 ,JAME/[N IS1 NO D\BT1 =M+ HIS PLANS4 ,IT TAKES TIME TO MATURE SU* AN UND]TAK+3 ONE MU/ FIR/ FAMILI>IZE HIMSELF ) ! NEW SURR\ND+S1 GET ONE'S BE>+S 9 ! PRISON4 ,SO F> ,I HAVE HAD BUT LITTLE *ANCE TO DO SO4 ,EVID5TLY1 IT IS ! POLICY ( ! AU?ORITIES TO KEEP ME 9 SOLIT>Y CONF9EM5T1 & 9 CONSEQU5T IGNORANCE ( ! 9TRICATE SY/EM ( HALLWAYS1 D\BLE GATES1 & W9D+ PASSAGES4 ,AT LIB]TY TO LEAVE ?IS PLACE1 IT W\LD PROVE DIFFICULT = ME TO F9D1 UNAID$1 MY WAY \T4 ,OH1 IF ,I POSSESS$ ! MAGIC R+ ,I DREAM$ ( LA/ NI<T6 ,IT WAS A WOND]FUL TALISMAN1 SECRET$-,I FANCI$ 9 ! DREAM-BY ! GODDESS ( ! ,SOCIAL ,REVOLUTION4 ,I SAW H] QUITE DI/9CTLY3 TALL & COMM&+1 ! RADIANCE ( ALL-CONQU]+ LOVE 9 H] EYES4 ,%E /OOD AT MY B$SIDE1 A SMILE ( SURPASS+ G5TL5ESS SUFFUS+ ! QUE5LY C\NT5ANCE1 H] >M EXT5D$ ABOVE ME1 HALF 9 BLESS+1 HALF PO9T+ T[>D ! D>K WALL4 ,EAG]LY ,I LOOK$ 9 ! DIRECTION ( ! >*$ H&-!RE1 9 A CREVICE1 SOME?+ LUM9\S GL[$ ) ! BRILLIANCY ( FRE% DEW 9 ! MORN+ SUN4 ,IT WAS A HE>T-%AP$ R+ CLEFT 9 ! C5T]4 ,ITS SC9TILLAT+ RAYS GLORIFI$ ! D>K CORN] ) ! AUREOLE ( A GREAT HOPE4 ,IMPULSIVELY ,I REA*$ \T1 & PRESS$ ! P>TS ( ! R+ 9TO A CLOSE-FITT+ :OLE1 :51 LO6 ! RAYS BUR/ 9TO A FIRE ?AT SPREAD & 9/ANTLY MELT$ ! IRON & /EEL1 & DISSOLV$ ! PRISON WALLS1 DISCLOS+ TO MY 5RAPTUR$ GAZE GRE5 FIELDS & WOODS1 & M5 & WOM5 PLAYFULLY AT WORK 9 ! SUN%9E ( FRE$OM4 ,& !N 444 SOME?+ DISPELL$ ! VISION4 

,OH1 IF ,I HAD ?AT MAGIC HE>T N[6 ,TO ESCAPE1 TO BE FREE6 ,MAY BE MY UNKN[N FRI5D WILL YET KEEP HIS WORD4 ,HE IS PROBABLY P]FECT+ PLANS1 OR P]HAPS IT IS NOT SAFE = HIM TO VISIT ME4 IF MY COMRADES C\LD AID ME1 ESCAPE W\LD BE FEASIBLE4 ,BUT ! ,GIRL & ,F$YA WILL NEV] CONSID] ! POSSIBILITY4 ,NO D\BT !Y REFRA9 FROM WRIT+ BECAUSE !Y MOM5T>ILY EXPECT TO  HE> ( MY SUICIDE4 ,H[ DI/RAU<T ! POOR ,GIRL MU/ BE6 ,YET %E %\LD HAVE WRITT53 IT IS N[ F\R DAYS S9CE MY REMOVAL TO ! P5IT5TI>Y4 ,EV]Y DAY ,I ANXI\SLY AWAIT ! COM+ ( ! ,*APLA91 :O DI/RIBUTES ! MAIL4-,!RE HE IS6 ,! QUICK1 N]V\S /EP HAS BECOME FAMILI> TO MY E>4 ,EXPECTANTLY ,I FOLL[ HIS MOVEM5TS2 ,I RECOGNIZE ! VIGOR\S SLAM ( ! DOOR & ! CLICK ( ! SPR+ LOCK4 ,! %ORT /EPS PATT] ON ! BRIDGE CONNECT+ ! UPP] ROTUNDA ) ! CELL- H\SE1 & PASS ALONG ! GALL]Y4 ,! SOLIT>Y FOOTFALL AMID ! SIL5CE REM9DS ME ( ! TIMID HA/E ( ONE CROSS+ A GRAVEY>D AT NI<T4 ,N[ ! ,*APLA9 PAUSES3 HE IS COMP>+ ! NUMB] ( ! WOOD5 BLOCK HANG+ \TSIDE ! CELL ) ?AT ON ! LETT]4 ,SOME ONE HAS REMEMB]$ A FRI5D 9 PRISON4 ,! /EPS CONT9UE & GR[ FA9T1 AS ! PO/MAN R\NDS ! DI/ANT CORN]4 ,HE PASSES ! CELL-R[ ON ! OPPOSITE SIDE1 ASC5DS ! TOPMO/ TI]1 & F9ALLY REA*ES ! GR\ND FLOOR CONTA9+ MY CELL4 ,MY HE>T BEATS FA/] AS ! S\ND APPROA*ES3 !RE MU/ SURELY BE A LETT] = ME4 ,HE IS NE>+ ! CELL-HE PAUSES4 ,I CAN'T SEE HIM YET1 BUT ,I KN[ HE IS COMP>+ NUMB]S4 ,P]HAPS ! LETT] IS = ME4 ,I HOPE ! ,*APLA9 WILL MAKE NO MI/AKE3 ,RANGE ,K1 ,CELL #f1 ,NUMB] ,A #g4 ,SOME?+ LI<T FLAPS ON ! FLOOR ( ! NEXT CELL1 & ! QUICK1 %ORT /EP HAS PASS$ ME BY4 ,NO MAIL = ME6 ,ANO!R TW5TY-F\R H\RS MU/ ELAPSE BE=E ,I MAY RECEIVE A LETT]1 & !N1 TOO1 P]HAPS ! FA9T %AD[ WILL NOT PAUSE AT MY DOOR4 

,I,I 

,! ?\<T ( MY TW5TY-TWO-YE> S5T5CE IS DRIV+ ME DESP]ATE4 ,I W\LD MAKE USE ( ANY MEANS1 H[EV] T]RIBLE1 TO ESCAPE FROM ?IS HELL1 TO REGA9 LIB]TY4 ,LIB]TY6 ,:AT W\LD IT NOT (F] ME AFT] ?IS EXP]I5CE8 ,I %\LD HAVE ! GREATE/ OPPORTUNITY = REVOLUTION>Y ACTIVITY4 ,I W\LD *OOSE ,RUSSIA4  ,! ,MO/IAN] HAVE =SAK5 ME4 ,I WILL KEEP ALO(1 BUT !Y %ALL LE>N :AT A TRUE REVOLUTIONI/ IS CAPABLE ( ACCOMPLI%+4 ,IF !RE IS A SP>K ( MANHOOD 9 !M1 !Y WILL BLU% = !IR DESPICABLE ATTITUDE T[>D MY ACT1 !IR %AMEFUL TREATM5T ( ME4 ,H[ EAG] !Y WILL !N BE TO PROVE !IR CONFID5CE BY EXAGG]AT$ DEVOTION1 TO SALVE !IR GUILTY CONSCI5CE6 ,I %\LD NOT HAVE TO COMPLA9 ( A LACK ( F9ANCIAL AID1 W]E ,I TO 9=M \R 9TIMATE CIRCLES ( MY PLANS REG>D+ FUTURE ACTIVITY 9 ,RUSSIA4 ,IT W\LD BE GLORI\S1 GLORI\S6 ,S-% 

,IT'S ! ,*APLA94 ,P]HAPS HE HAS MAIL = ME TO-DAY4444 ,MAY BE HE IS SUPPRESS+ LETT]S FROM MY FRI5DS2 OR PROBABLY IT IS ! ,W>D5'S FAULT3 ! MAILBAG IS FIR/ EXAM9$ 9 HIS (FICE4-,N[ ! ,*APLA9 IS DESC5D+ TO ! GR\ND FLOOR4 ,HE PAUSES4 ,IT MU/ BE ,CELL #b GETT+ A LETT]4 ,N[ HE IS COM+4 ,! %AD[ IS OPPOSITE MY DOOR1-GONE6 

0,*APLA91 ONE MOM5T1 PLEASE40 

0,:O'S CALL+80 

0,H]E1 ,*APLA94 ,CELL #f ,K40 

0,:AT IS IT1 MY BOY80 

0,*APLA91 ,I %\LD LIKE SOME?+ TO READ40 

0,READ8 ,:Y1 WE HAVE A SPL5DID LIBR>Y1 M'BOY2 V]Y F9E LIBR>Y4 ,I WILL S5D Y\ A CATALOG1 & Y\ CAN DRAW ONE BOOK EV]Y WEEK40 

0,I MISS$ LIBR>Y DAY ON ?IS RANGE4 ,I'LL HAVE TO WAIT ANO!R WEEK4 ,BUT ,I'D LIKE TO HAVE SOME?+ 9 ! MEANTIME1 ,*APLA94 0 

0,Y\ >E NOT WORK+1 M'BOY80 

0,NO40 

0,Y\ HAVE NOT REFUS$ TO WORK1 HAVE Y\80 

0,NO1 ,I HAVE NOT BE5 (F]$ ANY WORK YET40 

0,OHL WELL1 Y\ WILL BE ASSIGN$ SOON4 ,BE PATI5T1 M'BOY40 

0,BUT CAN'T ,I HAVE SOME?+ TO READ N[80 

0,ISN'T !RE A ,BIBLE 9 Y\R CELL811 

0,A ,BIBLE8 ,I DON'T BELIEVE 9 IT1 ,*APLA940  

0,MY BOY1 IT WILL DO Y\ NO H>M TO READ IT4 ,IT MAY DO Y\ GOOD4 ,READ IT1 M' BOY40 

,= A MOM5T ,I HESITATE4 ,A DESP]ATE IDEA CROSSES MY M9D4 

0,ALL RI<T1 ,*APLA91 ,I'LL READ ! ,BIBLE1 BUT ,I DON'T C>E = ! MOD]N ,5GLI% V]SION4 ,P]HAPS Y\ HAVE ONE ) ,GREEK OR ,LAT9 ANNOTATIONS80 

0,:Y1 :Y1 M' BOY1 DO Y\ UND]/& ,LAT9 OR ,GREEK80 

0,YES1 ,I HAVE /UDI$ ! CLASSICS40 

,! ,*APLA9 SEEMS IMPRESS$4 ,HE /EPS CLOSE TO ! DOOR1 LEAN+ AGA9/ IT 9 ! ATTITUDE ( A MAN PREP>$ = A LONG CONV]SATION4 ,WE TALK AB\T ! CLASSICS1 ! S\RCES ( MY KN[L$GE1 ,RUSSIAN S*OOLS1 SOCIAL CONDITIONS4 ,AN 9T]E/+ & 9TELLIG5T MAN1 ?IS PRISON ,*APLA91 AN EXT5SIVE TRAVEL] :OSE VISIT TO ,RUSSIA HAD IMPRESS$ HIM ) ! GREAT POSSIBILITIES ( ?AT C\NTRY4 ,F9ALLY HE MOTIONS TO A GU>D3 

0,LET ,A #g COME ) ME40 

,) A SUSPICI\S GLANCE AT ME1 ! (FIC] UNLOCKS ! DOOR4 0,%ALL ,I COME ALONG1 ,*APLA980 HE ASKS4 

0,NO1 NO4 ,IT IS ALL RI<T4 ,COME1 M'BOY40 

,PA/ ! TI] ( VACANT CELLS1 WE ASC5D ! /AIRWAY TO ! UPP] ROTUNDA1 ON ! LEFT SIDE ( :I* IS ! ,*APLA9'S (FICE4 ,EXCIT$ & AL]T1 ,I ABSORB EV]Y DETAIL ( ! SURR\ND+S4 ,I /RIVE TO APPE> 9DIFF]5T1 :ILE FURTIVELY FOLL[+ EV]Y MOVEM5T ( ! ,*APLA91 AS HE SELECTS ! ROTUNDA KEY FROM ! L>GE BUN* 9 HIS H&1 & OP5S ! DOOR4 ,PASSIONATE LONG+ = LIB]TY IS CONSUM+ ME4 ,A PLAN ( ESCAPE IS MATUR+ 9 MY M9D4 ,! ,*APLA9 C>RIES ALL ! KEYS-HE LIVES 9 ! ,W>D5'S H\SE1 CONNECT$ ) ! PRISON-HE IS SO FRAGILE-,I C\LD EASILY OV]P[] HIM-!RE IS NO ONE 9 ! ROTUNDA-,I'D /IFLE HIS CRIES-TAKE ! KEYS- 

0,HAVE A SEAT1 MY BOY4 ,SIT D[N4 ,H]E >E SOME BOOKS4 ,LOOK !M OV]4 ,I HAVE A DUPLICATE ( MY P]SONAL ,BIBLE1 ) ANNOTATIONS4 ,IT IS SOME:]E H]E40 

,) FEV]I% EYES ,I WAT* HIM LAY ! KEYS ON ! DESK4 ,A  QUICK MOTION1 & !Y W\LD BE M9E4 ,?AT L>GE & HEAVY ONE1 IT MU/ BELONG TO ! GATE4 ,IT IS SO BIG1-ONE BL[ W\LD KILL HIM4 ,AH1 !RE IS A SAFE6 ,! ,*APLA9 IS TAK+ SOME BOOKS FROM IT4 ,HIS BACK IS TURN$ TO ME4 ,A ?RU/-& ,I'D LOCK HIM 94444 ,/EAL?ILY1 IMP]CEPTIBLY1 ,I DRAW NE>] TO ! DESK1 MY EYES FA/5$ ON ! KEYS4 ,N[ ,I B5D OV] !M1 PRET5D+ TO BE ABSORB$ 9 A BOOK1 ! :ILE MY H& GLIDES =W>D1 SL[LY1 CAUTI\SLY4 ,QUICKLY ,I LEAN OV]2 ! OP5 BOOK 9 MY H&S 5TIRELY HIDES ! KEYS4 ,MY H& T\*ES !M4 ,DESP]ATELY ,I CLUT* ! L>GE1 HEAVY BUN*1 MY >M SL[LY RISES 

0,MY BOY1 ,I CANNOT F9D ?AT ,BIBLE JU/ N[1 BUT ,I'LL GIVE Y\ SOME O!R BOOK4 ,SIT D[N1 MY BOY4 ,I AM SO SORRY AB\T Y\4 ,I AM AN (FIC] ( ! ,/ATE1 BUT ,I ?9K Y\ W]E DEALT ) UNJU/LY4 ,Y\R S5T5CE IS QUITE EXCESSIVE4 ,I CAN WELL UND]/& ! /ATE ( M9D ?AT ACTUAT$ Y\1 A Y\NG 5?USIA/1 9 !SE EXCIT+ TIMES4 ,IT WAS 9 CONNECTION ) ,HOME/EAD1 IS IT NOT SO1 M' BOY80 

,I FALL BACK 9TO ! *AIR1 %AK51 UNMANN$4 ,?AT DEEP NOTE ( SYMPA?Y1 ! S9C]ITY ( ! TREMBL+ VOICE-NO1 NO1 ,I CANNOT T\* HIM4444 

,I,I,I 

,AT LA/1 MAIL FROM ,NEW ,YORK6 ,LETT]S FROM ! ,GIRL & ,F$YA4 ,) A FEEL+ ( MIX$ ANXIETY & RES5TM5T1 ,I GAZE AT ! FAMILI> H&WRIT+4 ,:Y DIDN'T !Y WRITE BE=E8 ,! $GE ( EXPECTANCY HAS BE5 DULL$ BY ! LONG SUSP5SE4 ,! ,GIRL & ! ,TW91 MY CLOSE/1 MO/ 9TIMATE FRI5DS ( YE/]DAY1-BUT ! YE/]DAY SEEMS SO DI/ANT 9 ! PA/1 ITS V]Y REALITY SUBM]G$ 9 ! TIDE ( S\L-RACK+ EV5TS4 

,!RE IS A NOTE ( DISAPPO9TM5T1 ALMO/ ( BITT]NESS1 9 ! ,GIRL'S LETT]4 ,! FAILURE ( MY ACT WILL LESS5 ! MORAL EFFECT1 & DIM9I% ITS PROPAG&I/IC VALUE4 ,! SITUATION IS  AGGRAVAT$ BY ,MO/4 ,[+ TO HIS DISP>AG+ ATTITUDE1 ! ,G]MANS REMA9 9DIFF]5T4 ,TO A CONSID]ABLE EXT5T1 EV5 ! ,JEWI% REVOLUTION>Y ELEM5T HAS BE5 9FLU5C$ BY HIM4 ,! ,TW91 9 VEIL$ & AB/RUSE ,RUSSIAN1 H9TS AT ! ATTEMPT$ COMPLETION ( MY WORK1 PLANN$1 YET IMPOSSIBLE ( REALIZATION4 

,I SMILE SCORNFULLY AT ! 0COMPLETION0 ?AT FAIL$ EV5 ( AN ATTEMPT4 ,! DAMN+LY FALSE VIEWPO9T ( ! ,GIRL EXASP]ATES ME1 & ,I ANGRILY RES5T ! DISAPPROV+ SURPRISE ,I S5SE 9 BO? LETT]S AT MY CONT9U$ EXI/5CE4 

,I READ ! L9ES REPEAT$LY4 ,EV]Y WORD DRIPS BITT]NESS 9TO MY S\L4 ,HAVE ,I GR[N MORBID1 OR DO !Y ACTUALLY PRESUME TO REPROA* ME ) MY FAILURE TO SUICIDE8 ,BY :AT RI<T8 ,IMPATI5TLY ,I SMO!R ! ACCUS+ :ISP] ( MY CONSCI5CE1 0,BY ! RI<T ( REVOLUTION>Y E?ICS40 ,! WILL TO LIVE LEAPS 9TO BE+ P]EMPTORILY1 MORE COMPELL+ & IMP]ATIVE AT ! IMPLI$ *ALL5GE4 

,NO1 ,I WILL /RUGGLE & FI<T6 ,FRI5D OR 5EMY1 !Y %ALL LE>N ?AT ,I AM NOT SO EASILY DONE =4 ,I WILL LIVE1 TO ESCAPE1 TO CONQU]6 

7,S\RCE3 ,B]KMAN1 ,ALEX&] 7#a#i#a#b7 ,PRISON ,MEMOIRS ( AN ,AN>*I/1 ,MO!R ,E>? ,PRESS47 

,FROM 3 ,AN>*Y ,>*IVES4 

,*RONOLOGY 3 
,NOVEMB] #c1 #aiaa 3 ,P>T #b1 ,*APT] #b -- ,PUBLICATION4 
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