,BOOK #f1 ,*APT] #h 

#ahfiahfi 

,PEOPLE 3 

,AU?OR 3 ,LEO ,TOL/OY 

,TEXT 3 

,AGA9 ,PI]RE WAS OV]TAK5 BY ! DEPRESSION HE SO DREAD$4 ,= ?REE DAYS 
 AFT] ! DELIV]Y ( HIS SPEE* AT ! LODGE HE LAY ON A S(A AT HOME 
 RECEIV+ NO ONE & GO+ NO:]E4 

,IT WAS JU/ !N ?AT HE RECEIV$ A LETT] FROM HIS WIFE1 :O IMPLOR$ HIM 
 TO SEE H]1 TELL+ HIM H[ GRIEV$ %E WAS AB\T HIM & H[ %E WI%$ 
 TO DEVOTE H] :OLE LIFE TO HIM4 

,AT ! 5D ( ! LETT] %E 9=M$ HIM ?AT 9 A FEW DAYS %E W\LD 
 RETURN TO ,PET]SBURG FROM ABROAD4 

,FOLL[+ ?IS LETT] ONE ( ! ,MASONIC ,BRO!RS :OM ,PI]RE RESPECT$ 
 LESS ?AN ! O!RS =C$ HIS WAY 9 TO SEE HIM &1 TURN+ ! 
 CONV]SATION UPON ,PI]RE'S MATRIMONIAL AFFAIRS1 BY WAY ( FRAT]NAL ADVICE 
 EXPRESS$ ! OP9ION ?AT HIS SEV]ITY TO HIS WIFE WAS WRONG & ?AT HE 
 WAS NEGLECT+ ONE ( ! FIR/ RULES ( ,FREEMASONRY BY NOT =GIV+ ! 
 P5IT5T4 

,AT ! SAME TIME HIS MO!R-9-LAW1 ,PR9CE ,VASILI'S WIFE1 S5T TO HIM 
 IMPLOR+ HIM TO COME IF ONLY = A FEW M9UTES TO DISCUSS A MO/ 
 IMPORTANT MATT]4 ,PI]RE SAW ?AT !RE WAS A CONSPIRACY AGA9/ HIM & 
 ?AT !Y WANT$ TO REUNITE HIM ) HIS WIFE1 & 9 ! MOOD HE !N 
 WAS1 ?IS WAS NOT EV5 UNPLEASANT TO HIM4 ,NO?+ MATT]$ TO HIM4 ,NO?+ 
 9 LIFE SEEM$ TO HIM ( MU* IMPORTANCE1 & UND] ! 9FLU5CE ( ! 
 DEPRESSION ?AT POSSESS$ HIM HE VALU$ NEI!R HIS LIB]TY NOR HIS 
 RESOLUTION TO PUNI% HIS WIFE4 

0,NO ONE IS RI<T & NO ONE IS TO BLAME2 SO %E TOO IS NOT TO BLAME10 HE 
 ?\<T4 

,IF HE DID NOT AT ONCE GIVE HIS CONS5T TO A REUNION ) HIS WIFE1 IT WAS 
 ONLY BECAUSE 9 HIS /ATE ( DEPRESSION HE DID NOT FEEL ABLE TO TAKE ANY 
 /EP4 ,HAD HIS WIFE COME TO HIM1 HE W\LD NOT HAVE TURN$ H] AWAY4 
 ,COMP>$ TO :AT PREOCCUPI$ HIM1 WAS IT NOT A MATT] ( 9DIFF]5CE 
 :E!R HE LIV$ ) HIS WIFE OR NOT8 

,)\T REPLY+ EI!R TO HIS WIFE OR HIS MO!R-9-LAW1 ,PI]RE LATE ONE 
 NI<T PREP>$ = A J\RNEY & />T$ = ,MOSC[ TO SEE ,JOSEPH 
 ,ALEXEEVI*4 ,?IS IS :AT HE NOT$ 9 HIS DI>Y3 

,MOSC[1 #a#g? ,NOVEMB] 

,I HAVE JU/ RETURN$ FROM MY B5EFACTOR1 & HA/5 TO WRITE D[N :AT ,I 
 HAVE EXP]I5C$4 ,JOSEPH ,ALEXEEVI* IS LIV+ POORLY & HAS = ?REE 
 YE>S BE5 SUFF]+ FROM A PA9FUL DISEASE ( ! BLADD]4 ,NO ONE HAS 
 EV] HE>D HIM UTT] A GROAN OR A WORD ( COMPLA9T4 ,FROM MORN+ TILL 
 LATE AT NI<T1 EXCEPT :5 HE EATS HIS V]Y PLA9 FOOD1 HE IS WORK+ AT 
 SCI5CE4 ,HE RECEIV$ ME GRACI\SLY & MADE ME SIT D[N ON ! B$ ON 
 :I* HE LAY4 ,I MADE ! SIGN ( ! ,KNI<TS ( ! ,EA/ & ( ,J]USALEM1 
 & HE RESPOND$ 9 ! SAME MANN]1 ASK+ ME ) A MILD SMILE :AT ,I 
 HAD LE>N$ & GA9$ 9 ! ,PRUSSIAN & ,SCOTTI% LODGES4 ,I TOLD HIM 
 EV]Y?+ AS BE/ ,I C\LD1 & TOLD HIM :AT ,I HAD PROPOS$ TO \R 
 ,PET]SBURG LODGE1 ( ! BAD RECEPTION ,I HAD 5C\NT]$1 & ( MY 
 RUPTURE ) ! ,BRO!RS4 ,JOSEPH ,ALEXEEVI*1 HAV+ REMA9$ SIL5T & 
 ?\<TFUL = A GOOD :ILE1 TOLD ME HIS VIEW ( ! MATT]1 :I* AT ONCE 
 LIT UP = ME MY :OLE PA/ & ! FUTURE PA? ,I %\LD FOLL[4 ,HE 
 SURPRIS$ ME BY ASK+ :E!R ,I REMEMB]$ ! ?REEFOLD AIM ( ! 
 ORD]3 7#a7 ,! PRES]VATION & /UDY ( ! MY/]Y4 7#b7 ,! PURIFICATION 
 & RE=MATION ( ONESELF = ITS RECEPTION1 & 7#c7 ,! IMPROVEM5T ( 
 ! HUMAN RACE BY /RIV+ = SU* PURIFICATION4 ,:I* IS ! PR9CIPAL 
 AIM ( !SE ?REE8 ,C]TA9LY SELF-RE=MATION & SELF-PURIFICATION4 ,ONLY 
 TO ?IS AIM CAN WE ALWAYS /RIVE 9DEP5D5TLY ( CIRCUM/ANCES4 ,BUT AT 
 ! SAME TIME JU/ ?IS AIM DEM&S ! GREATE/ EF=TS ( US2 & SO1 
 L$ A/RAY BY PRIDE1 LOS+ SI<T ( ?IS AIM1 WE OCCUPY \RSELVES EI!R 
 ) ! MY/]Y :I* 9 \R IMPURITY WE >E UNWOR?Y TO RECEIVE1 OR SEEK 
 ! RE=MATION ( ! HUMAN RACE :ILE \RSELVES SETT+ AN EXAMPLE ( 
 BAS5ESS & PR(LIGACY4 ,ILLUM9ISM IS NOT A PURE DOCTR9E1 JU/ BECAUSE 
 IT IS ATTRACT$ BY SOCIAL ACTIVITY & PUFF$ UP BY PRIDE4 ,ON ?IS GR\ND 
 ,JOSEPH ,ALEXEEVI* CONDEMN$ MY SPEE* & MY :OLE ACTIVITY1 & 9 ! 
 DEP? ( MY S\L ,I AGRE$ ) HIM4 ,TALK+ ( MY FAMILY AFFAIRS HE SAID 
 TO ME1 0! *IEF DUTY ( A TRUE ,MASON1 AS ,I HAVE TOLD Y\1 LIES 9 
 P]FECT+ HIMSELF4 ,WE (T5 ?9K ?AT BY REMOV+ ALL ! DIFFICULTIES 
 ( \R LIFE WE %ALL MORE QUICKLY REA* \R AIM1 BUT ON ! CONTR>Y1 MY 
 DE> SIR1 IT IS ONLY 9 ! MID/ ( WORLDLY C>ES ?AT WE CAN ATTA9 \R 
 ?REE *IEF AIMS3 7#a7 ,SELF-KN[L$GE--= MAN CAN ONLY KN[ HIMSELF 
 BY COMP>ISON1 7#b7 ,SELF-P]FECT+1 :I* CAN ONLY BE ATTA9$ BY 
 CONFLICT1 & 7#c7 ,! ATTA9M5T ( ! *IEF VIRTUE--LOVE ( DEA?4 
 ,ONLY ! VICISSITUDES ( LIFE CAN %[ US ITS VANITY & DEVELOP \R 
 9NATE LOVE ( DEA? OR ( REBIR? TO A NEW LIFE40 ,!SE WORDS >E ALL ! 
 MORE REM>KABLE BECAUSE1 9 SPITE ( HIS GREAT PHYSICAL SUFF]+S1 ,JOSEPH 
 ,ALEXEEVI* IS NEV] WE>Y ( LIFE ?\< HE LOVES DEA?1 = :I*--9 
 SPITE ( ! PURITY & L(T9ESS ( HIS 9N] MAN--HE DOES NOT YET 
 FEEL HIMSELF SUFFICI5TLY PREP>$4 ,MY B5EFACTOR !N EXPLA9$ TO ME 
 FULLY ! MEAN+ ( ! ,GREAT ,SQU>E ( CREATION & PO9T$ \T TO ME 
 ?AT ! NUMB]S ?REE & SEV5 >E ! BASIS ( EV]Y?+4 ,HE ADVIS$ 
 ME NOT TO AVOID 9T]C\RSE ) ! ,PET]SBURG ,BRO!RS1 BUT TO TAKE UP 
 ONLY SECOND-GRADE PO/S 9 ! LODGE1 TO TRY1 :ILE DIV]T+ ! ,BRO!RS 
 FROM PRIDE1 TO TURN !M T[>D ! TRUE PA? SELF-KN[L$GE & 
 SELF-P]FECT+4 ,BESIDES ?IS HE ADVIS$ ME = MYSELF P]SONALLY ABOVE 
 ALL TO KEEP A WAT* OV] MYSELF1 & TO ?AT 5D HE GAVE ME A NOTEBOOK1 
 ! ONE ,I AM N[ WRIT+ 9 & 9 :I* ,I WILL 9 FUTURE NOTE D[N ALL MY 
 ACTIONS4 

,PET]SBURG1 #b#cRD ,NOVEMB] 

,I AM AGA9 LIV+ ) MY WIFE4 ,MY MO!R-9-LAW CAME TO ME 9 TE>S & 
 SAID ?AT ,HEL5E WAS H]E & ?AT %E IMPLOR$ ME TO HE> H]2 ?AT %E 
 WAS 9NOC5T & UNHAPPY AT MY DES]TION1 & MU* MORE4 ,I KNEW ?AT IF ,I 
 ONCE LET MYSELF SEE H] ,I %\LD NOT HAVE /R5G? TO GO ON REFUS+ :AT 
 %E WANT$4 ,9 MY P]PLEXITY ,I DID NOT KN[ :OSE AID & ADVICE TO SEEK4 
 ,HAD MY B5EFACTOR BE5 H]E HE W\LD HAVE TOLD ME :AT TO DO4 ,I W5T TO MY 
 ROOM & R]EAD ,JOSEPH ,ALEXEEVI*'S LETT]S & RECALL$ MY CONV]SATIONS 
 ) HIM1 & D$UC$ FROM IT ALL ?AT ,I \<T NOT TO REFUSE A SUPPLICANT1 
 & \<T TO REA* A HELP+ H& TO EV]YONE--ESPECIALLY TO ONE SO 
 CLOSELY B\ND TO ME--& ?AT ,I MU/ BE> MY CROSS4 ,BUT IF ,I =GIVE 
 H] = ! SAKE ( DO+ RI<T1 !N LET UNION ) H] HAVE ONLY A 
 SPIRITUAL AIM4 ,?AT IS :AT ,I DECID$1 & :AT ,I WROTE TO ,JOSEPH 
 ,ALEXEEVI*4 ,I TOLD MY WIFE ?AT ,I BEGG$ H] TO =GET ! PA/1 TO 
 =GIVE ME :ATEV] WRONG ,I MAY HAVE DONE H]1 & ?AT ,I HAD NO?+ TO 
 =GIVE4 ,IT GAVE ME JOY TO TELL H] ?IS4 ,%E NE$ NOT KN[ H[ H>D IT 
 WAS = ME TO SEE H] AGA94 ,I HAVE SETTL$ ON ! UPP] FLOOR ( ?IS BIG 
 H\SE & AM EXP]I5C+ A HAPPY FEEL+ ( REG5]ATION4 

,FROM 3 ,GUT5B]G4ORG4 

,*RONOLOGY 3 
,NOVEMB] #c1 #ahfh 3 ,BOOK #f1 ,*APT] #h -- ,PUBLICATION4 
,FEBRU>Y #a#a1 #bag 3 ,BOOK #f1 ,*APT] #h -- ,ADD$4 

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