,*APT] #a #aidaid ,PEOPLE 3 ,AU?OR 3 ,LEO ,TOL/OY ,TEXT 3 ,I HAVE NEV] S9CE EXP]I5C$ SU* A FEEL+ ( COMPASSION T[>DS M5 & ( AV]SION T[>DS MYSELF1 AS ,I FELT 9 ,LIAP9'S H\SE4 ,I WAS N[ FILL$ ) ! DESIRE TO C>RY \T ! S*EME ,I HAD ALREADY BEGUN & TO DO GOOD TO ! M5 :OM ,I HAD MET4 ,&1 /RANGE TO SAY1 ?\< IT MI TO ?AT 9 ,LIAP9'S H\SE2 BUT IT FAIL$ TO PRODUCE AGA9 ! SAME EFFECT & CREAT$ A V]Y DIFF]5T IMPRESSION4 ,IT BEGAN ) MY F9D+ 9 ONE ( ! LODG+S A MIS]ABLE P]SON :O REQUIR$ IMM$IATE HELP1--A WOMAN :O HAD NOT EAT5 FOOD = TWO DAYS4 ,IT HAPP5$ ?US3 ,9 ONE V]Y L>GE & ALMO/ EMPTY NIN ANY?+4 ,! L&LADY HAS HAD PITY ON H]1 BUT N[ %E WANTS TO TURN H] \T4--,AGAFIA6 ,I SAY1 ,AGAFIA60 CRI$ ! OLD WOMAN4 ,WE W5T A LITTLE NE>]1 & SAW SOME?+ RISE FROM ! PALLET4 ,?IS WAS A GRAY-HAIR$1 DI%EVEL$ WOMAN1 ?9 AS A SKELETON1 9 A DIRTY1 TORN *EMISE1 & ) PECULI>LY GLITT]+1 IMMOVABLE EYES4 ,%E LOOK$ FIX$LY BEYOND US1 TRI$ TO SNAT* UP H] JACKET BEH9D H] 9 ORD] TO COV] H] BONY *E/1 & GR[L$ \T LIKE A DOG1 0,:AT8 :AT80 ,I ASK$ H] H[ %E MANAG$ TO LIVE4 ,= SOME TIME %E WAS UNABLE TO SEE ! DRIFT ( MY WORDS & SAID1 0,I DON'T KN[ MYSELF2 !Y >E GO+ TO TURN ME \T40 ,I ASK$ AGA92 & OH1 H[ A%AM$ ( MYSELF ,I FEEL6 MY H& CAN SC>CELY WRITE IT6 ,I ASK$ H] :E!R IT WAS TRUE ?AT %E WAS />V+4 ,%E REPLI$ 9 ! SAME FEV]I%1 EXCIT$ MANN]1 0,I HAD NO?+ TO EAT YE/]DAY2 ,I HAVE HAD NO?+ TO EAT TO-DAY40 ,! MIS]ABLE ASPECT ( ?IS WOMAN IMPRESS$ ME DEEPLY1 BUT QUITE DIFF]5TLY FROM ?OSE 9 ,LIAP9'S H\SE3 !RE1 \T ( PITY = !M1 ,I FELT EMB>RASS$ & A%AM$ ( MYSELF2 BUT H]E1 ,I REJOIC$ ?AT ,I HAD AT LA/ F\ND :AT ,I HAD BE5 LOOK+ =1--A HUNGRY BE+4 ,I GAVE H] A RUBLE & ,I REMEMB] H[ GLAD ,I FELT ?AT ! O!RS HAD SE5 IT4 ,! OLD WOMAN =?) ASK$ ME ALSO = MONEY4 ,IT WAS SO PLEASANT TO ME TO GIVE ?AT ,I H&$ H] SOME ALSO1 )\T ?9K+ :E!R IT WAS NECESS>Y OR NOT4 ,%E ACCOMPANI$ ME TO ! DOOR1 & ?OSE :O W]E 9 ! CORRIDOR HE>D H[ %E ?ANK$ ME4 ,PROBABLY MY QUE/IONS AB\T ! POOR PROVOK$ EXPECTATIONS1 = SOME ( ! 9MATES BEGAN TO FOLL[ US :]EV] WE W5T4 ,AMONG ?OSE ?AT BEGG$1 !RE W]E EVID5TLY DRUNK>DS1 :O GAVE ME A MO/ DISAGREEABLE IMPRESSION2 BUT HAV+ ONCE GIV5 TO ! OLD WOMAN ,I ?\$ DOGG+ MY /EPS4 ,:5 ,I CAME \T ( ! Y>D1 A BOY RAN QUICKLY D[N ! /AIRS1 PU%+ ?R\< ! PEOPLE4 ,HE DID NOT NOTICE ME & SAID HURRI$LY1-- 0,HE GAVE A RUBLE TO ,AGAFIA60 ,HAV+ REA*$ ! GR\ND1 HE1 TOO1 JO9$ ! CR[D ?AT WAS FOLL[+ ME4 ,I CAME \T 9TO ! /REET4 ,ALL SORTS ( PEOPLE CR[D$ R\ND BEGG+ = MONEY4 ,HAV+ GIV5 AWAY ALL ,I HAD 9 COPP]S1 ,I 5T]$ A %OP & ASK$ ! PROPRIETOR TO GIVE ME *ANGE = T5 RUBLES4 ,H]E OCCURR$ A SC5E SIMIL> TO ?AT :I* TOOK PLACE 9 ,LIAP9'S H\SE4 ,A DREADFUL CONFUSION 5SU$4 ,OLD WOM51 SE$Y G5TLEFOLK1 PEASANTS1 *ILDR51 ALL CR[D$ AB\T ! %OP1 /RET*+ \T !IR H&S2 ,I GAVE1 & ASK$ SOME ( !M AB\T !IR POSITION & MEANS1 & 5T]$ ALL 9 MY NOTE-BOOK4 ,! %OPKEEP]1 HAV+ TURN$ UP ! FUR COLL> ( HIS GREAT-COAT1 WAS SITT+ LIKE A /ATUE1 GLANC+ N[ & !N AT ! CR[D1 & AGA9 />+ BEYOND IT4 ,HE APP>5TLY FELT LIKE EV]YONE ELSE1 ?AT ALL ?IS WAS V]Y FOOLI%1 BUT HE D>$ NOT SAY SO4 ,9 ,LIAP9'S H\SE ! MIS]Y & HUMILIATION ( ! PEOPLE HAD OV]:ELM$ ME2 & ,I FELT MYSELF TO BLAME = IT1 & ALSO ! DESIRE & ! POSSIBILITY ( BECOM+ A BETT] MAN4 ,BUT ?\< ! SC5E H]E WAS SIMIL>1 IT PRODUC$ QUITE A DIFF]5T EFFECT4 ,9 ! FIR/ PLACE1 ,I FELT ANGRY ) MANY ( ?OSE :O ASSAIL$ ME1 & !N ANXI\S AS TO :AT ! %OPM5 & ! DVORNIKS MIATELY1 DID NOT AWAK5 ANY SYMPA?Y 9 ME4 ,I FELT ?AT EV]Y ONE LI$1 OR AT LEA/ PREV>ICAT$1 & REG>D$ ME ONLY AS A PURSE \T ( :I* MONEY C\LD BE DRAWN4 ,IT (T5 SEEM$ TO ME ?AT ! V]Y MONEY EXTORT$ FROM ME DID NOT IMPROVE !IR POSITION BUT ONLY MADE IT WORSE4 ,! (T5] ,I W5T TO !SE H\SES1 ! CLOS] ! 9T]C\RSE :I* ,I HAD ) ! 9MATES1 ! MORE APP>5T BECAME ! IMPOSSIBILITY ( DO+ ANY?+2 BUT NOT)/&+ ?IS1 ,I DID NOT GIVE UP MY PLAN UNTIL AFT] ! LA/ NIT 9 ?IS LA/ T\R BEGAN TO ASSEMBLE 9 MY H\SE4 ,!Y W]E ALMO/ ALL /RANG]S TO ME4 ,SOME /UD5TS1 AN (FIC]1 & TWO ( MY FA%IONABLE ACQUA9TANCES1 :O1 AFT] HAV+ REPEAT$ ! USUAL PHRASE1 0,C'E/ TRES 9T]ESSANT60 ASK$ ME TO PUT !M 9TO ! NUMB] ( ! C5SUS-TAK]S4 ,!SE FA%IONABLE FRI5DS ( M9E HAD DRESS$ !MSELVES 9 %OOT+-JACKETS & TALL TRAVEL+ BOOTS1 :I* !Y ?\Y CLO!S4 ,!Y C>RI$ ) !M PECULI> POCKET-BOOKS & EXTRAORD9>Y-LOOK+ P5CILS4 ,!Y W]E 9 ?AT AGITAT$ /ATE ( M9D :I* ONE EXP]I5CES JU/ BE=E GO+ TO A HUNT1 OR TO A DUEL1 OR 9TO A BATTLE4 ,! FALS5ESS & FOOLI%NESS ( \R 5T]PRISE WAS N[ MORE APP>5T TO ME 9 LOOK+ AT !M2 BUT W]E WE NOT ALL 9 ! SAME RIDICUL\S POSITION8 ,BE=E />T+ WE HAD A CONF]5CE1 SOME:AT LIKE A C\NCIL ( W>1 AS TO :AT WE %\LD BEG9 )1 H[ TO DIVIDE \RSELVES1 & SO ON4 ,?IS CONF]5CE WAS JU/ LIKE ALL O!R (FICIAL C\NCILS1 MEET+S1 & COMMITTEES3 EA* SPOKE1 NOT BECAUSE HE HAD ANY?+ TO SAY1 OR TO ASK1 BUT BECAUSE EV]Y ONE TRI$ TO F9D SOME?+ TO SAY 9 ORD] NOT TO BE BEH9D ! RE/4 ,BUT DUR+ ! CONV]SATION NO ONE ALLUD$ TO ! ACTS ( B5EVOL5CE TO :I* ,I HAD SO MANY TIMES REF]R$2 & H[EV] MU* A%AM$ ,I FELT1 ,I F\ND IT WAS NE$FUL TO REM9D !M ?AT WE MU/ C>RY \T \R *>ITABLE 9T5TIONS BY WRIT+ D[N1 DUR+ ! VISIT+-T\R1 ! NAMES ( ALL :OM WE %\LD F9D 9 A DE/ITUTE CONDITION4 ,I HAD ALWAYS FELT A%AM$ TO SPEAK AB\T !SE MATT]S2 BUT H]E1 9 ! MID/ ( \R HURRI$ PREP>ATIONS = ! EXP$ITION1 ,I C\LD SC>CELY UTT] A WORD AB\T !M4 ,ALL LI/5$ TO ME & SEEM$ T\*$1 ALL AGRE$ ) ME 9 WORDS2 BUT IT WAS EVID5T ?AT EA* ( !M KNEW ?AT IT WAS FOLLY1 & ?AT IT W\LD LEAD TO NO?+1 & SO !Y BEGAN AT ONCE TO TALK AB\T O!R SUBJECTS1 & CONT9U$ DO+ SO UNTIL IT WAS TIME = US TO />T4 ,WE CAME TO ! D>K TAV]N1 >\S$ ! WAIT]S1 & BEGAN TO SORT \T PAP]S4 ,:5 WE W]E TOLD ?AT ! PEOPLE1 HAV+ HE>D AB\T ?IS VISIT+-T\R1 HAD BEGUN TO LEAVE !IR LODG+S1 WE ASK$ ! L&LORD TO %UT ! GATE1 & WE \RSELVES W5T TO ! Y>D TO P]SUADE ?OSE TO REMA9 :O WANT$ TO ESCAPE1 ASSUR+ !M ?AT NO ONE W\LD ASK TO SEE !IR PASSPORTS4 ,I REMEMB] ! /RANGE & PA9FUL IMPRESSION PRODUC$ UPON ME BY !SE FRI$ TALL BY ! LIK C\RT-Y>D4 ,FRI$ TO DO ANY?+ TO ESCAPE FROM US4 ,G5TLEM5 ( ALL K9DS1 T[N & C\NTRY POLICEM51 PUBLIC CORON] & JUDGES1 HAD1 ALL !IR LIVES1 BE5 HUNT+ !M 9 T[NS & VILLAGES1 ON ! ROADS & 9 ! /REETS1 9 ! TAV]NS & 9 ! LODG+-H\SES1 & SUDD5LY !SE G5TLEM5 HAD COME AT NIES TO BELIEVE ?AT ! DOGS HAD COME \T NOT TO CAT* BUT TO C\NT !M4 ,BUT ! GATES W]E %UT1 & ! FRIAT$ 9TO GR\PS1 BEGAN \R VISIT4 ,) ME W]E MY FA%IONABLE ACQUA9TANCES & TWO /UD5TS4 ,VANYA1 ) A LANT]N1 W5T BE=E US 9 A GREAT-COAT & :ITE TR\S]S1 & WE FOLL[$4 ,WE 5T]$ LODG+S WELL KN[N TO ME4 ,! PLACE WAS FAMILI>1 SOME ( ! P]SONS ALSO2 BUT ! MAJORITY W]E NEW TO ME1 & ! SPECTACLE WAS ALSO A NEW & DREADFUL ONE1--/ILL MORE DREADFUL ?AN ?AT :I* ,I HAD SE5 AT ,LIAP9'S H\SE4 ,ALL ! LODG+S W]E FILL$1 ALL ! PALLETS OCCUPI$1 & NOT ONLY BY ONE1 BUT (T5 BY TWO P]SONS4 ,! SIR[ B$S4 ,! SPECTACLE WAS DREADFUL1 [+ TO ! MIS]Y1 DIRT1 RAGG$NESS1 & T]ROR ( !SE PEOPLE2 & *IEFLY BECAUSE !RE W]E SO MANY ( !M4 ,ONE LODG+1 !N ANO!R1 !N A ?IRD1 A T5?1 A TW5TIE?1 & SO ON1 )\T 5D4 ,& EV]Y:]E ! SAME FE>FUL /5*1 ! SAME SUFFOCAT+ EXHALATION1 ! SAME CONFUSION ( SEXES1 M5 & WOM51 DRUNK1 OR 9 A /ATE ( 9S5SIBILITY2 ! SAME T]ROR1 SUBMISSIV5ESS1 & GUILT /AMP$ ON ALL FACES1 SO ?AT ,I FELT DEEPLY A%AM$ & GRIEV$1 AS ,I HAD BE=E AT ,LIAP9'S4 ,AT LA/ ,I UND]/OOD ?AT :AT ,I WAS AB\T TO DO WAS DISGU/+1 FOOLI%1 & !RE=E IMPOSSIBLE2 SO ,I LEFT (F WRIT+ D[N !IR NAMES & QUE/ION+ !M1 KN[+ N[ ?AT NO?+ W\LD COME ( IT4 ,I FELT DEEPLY HURT4 ,AT ,LIAP9'S ,I HAD BE5 LIKE A MAN :O SEES A HORRIBLE W\ND ON ! BODY ( ANO!R4 ,HE FEELS SORRY = ! MAN1 A%AM$ ( NOT HAV+ RELIEV$ HIM BE=E1 YET HE CAN /ILL HOPE TO HELP ! SUFF]]2 BUT N[ ,I WAS LIKE A DOCTOR :O COMES ) HIS [N M$IC9ES TO ! PATI5T1 UNCOV]S HIS W\ND ONLY TO MANGLE IT1 & TO CONFESS TO HIMSELF ?AT ALL HE HAS DONE HAS BE5 DONE 9 VA91 & ?AT HIS REM$Y IS 9EFFECTUAL4 ,FROM 3 ,GUT5B]G4ORG4 ,*RONOLOGY 3 ,NOVEMB] #c1 #aic 3 ,*APT] #a -- ,PUBLICATION4 ,FEBRU>Y #a#h1 #bag 3 ,*APT] #a -- ,ADD$4 FILE G5]AT$ FROM 3 HTTP3_/_/REVOLTLIB4COM_/